Dr Darryl Watts – End Of Terror

Dear Judith

JUDITH PAGET – Chief Executive, Aneurin Bevan University Health Board Trust

Last summer I was sectioned under the Mental Health Act. After two months or so in hospital I won my appeal against section in the Mental Health Review Tribunal Courts. I now have no psychiatric treatment and am a free man. I used my time in hospital to gather as much documentary evidence as possible and have reproduced in this blog post here my fight for justice. I wrote letters of complaint on an almost daily basis and am still dealing with the matter via the Ombudsman, my MP and Welsh Assembly Member plus the Minister of Health for the Welsh Government. If you are a detained mental patient I suggest that you fight in a similar manner and document your case as the results are apparent. I typed up all the documentation from handwritten letters photocopied in hospital and reproduce them here.I also submitted all my documentation to the Tribunal courts. ENJOY THE LITANY OF COMPLAINTS! (and responses)

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18th July 2016

Dear Judith Paget, Chief Executive, Aneurin Bevan University Health Board,

I am sure that you remember me Judith. I have previously written umpteen complaints to you regarding the abominable health treatment I receive from employees of your Trust. Most of the time these complaints achieve nothing other than generating even more animosity between staff and myself. I am a patient and thus an end user of the service. I expect to be treated like a human being at all times by Aneurin Bevan UHB employees.

I have been out of hospital since November, being discharged from section in January. My consultant psychiatrist was changed from Dr Basu to Dr Attwood. I was put under the care of the Abergavenny-based Assertive Outreach team with most of the outreach work being supervised by Freya Crowley. Since November I have kept my nose down and used the time out of hospital for recovery. I was severely traumatized by the torture I experienced on Talygarn and PICU and I haven’t been up to much at all. My fundamental aim is to stay out of hospital. I have received visits from AOT on a weekly basis, changing that at my request to fortnightly about two months ago. Dr Attwood has been out to visit me twice. I do prefer him to Dr Basu who quite frankly is an insane clown, yet I still wouldn’t trust Attwood as far as i could kick him and he has already threatened me with long term hospitalization for my next admission. I guess it’s the lesser of two evils.

I was removed from my university studies at Cardiff – Translation (BA) – to be incarcerated in your mental health system. I do prefer education to being part of a sick human experimentation where anything goes. However, it was deemed by the authorities that it was better for me to while away my time in hospital. I will be returning to the second year of my course in September at which point I will be severing all ties with mental health workers to focus on my goals of achieving a degree – something I have been trying to do since 1997 when I was initially removed from study. Over the past month I have started to become more outgoing and active. I completed a university assessment for the course I missed whilst in hospital and achieved a 75% mark – a first class honours. I started quite heavy exercise, returning to the gym and attending various martial arts classes. I also began t read heavily and reignite my websites. I am taking things at a steady pace despite the increase in useful activity. To do well in university I need to be as fit and healthy as possible and sitting around like a mental health couch potato is not a good way to prepare for the challenge ahead.

Freya from Assertive Outreach has been devolving her responsibilities as my primary carer and sending out junior members of the team, including students. I had two junior members from AOT attend my home last Tuesday. I don’t know their names as they are all strangers to me and there are so many people on this AOT team. From the outset of our meeting they were both hostile. It was obvious that they weren’t in the best of moods. I stopped what I was doing and paid attention to them. They were just conducting a fascist style interrogation, totally nitpicking at anything I said and inferring that I was mentally ill.I recognized their game and resisted but it didn’t matter what I said they had made up their minds. This is despite the fact that all of my friends and family and everyone else in society have been remarking on how well I’m doing and how they are glad to see me finally getting back involved in the community and my life. I realize that any change from being a mental health couch potato might strike AOT as being odd, but it is not my aim to be totally subjected to the totalitarianism of the mental health act. I do intend to live a good, healthy life in spite of constant oppression by your employees and Gwent Police.

The two members of AOT went away and my partner Nicola and I were instantly frightened. We spent the rest of the day jumping out of our skins when a car pulled up outside our home, worried sick that it was a police snatch squad. I have cancelled all my activity with martial arts and going to the gym and cannot concentrate on reading. My suspicions of the team’s intent were proved correct this morning. I received a worrying phone call from Freya Crowley dictating to me that the team were concerned about my mental health and how Dr Attwood’s underling doctor (some Asian sounding name) was going to be making an emergency visit. Now this set all the alarm bells ringing. I stayed calm on the phone and informed Freya that I would be receiving no emergency visit as my mental health was fine. I explained that the two women from AOT last Tuesday were out of order and misconstruing evidence. I said to Freya that if she insisted a doctor attend it could be done on the next scheduled fortnightly visit when I expected to see her. I also stipulated that it should be Dr Attwood in attendance and that he should not be diffusing responsibility to his junior doctor.

I am now sat at home, absolutely petrified about the forthcoming week and whether or not I will retain my liberty. I did immediately phone my solicitor Neil Confrey, for advice. He instructed me to remain calm with these halfwits when they do turn up.

I want to know why it is that, technically a free man, I am subjected to what is tantamount to Cartel-like intimidation in my home. If I was being stalked by the Sicilian Mafia the maybe I should expect to live in fear. These are your employees, supposedly having a mandate for healthcare. They induce poor health in people, through their lack of training and irresponsible behaviour. Yes, they have done this many many times over the years but this does not mean that the cycle will perpetuate forever. I can assure you that I will break this cycle and live unmolested in a normal fashion, contributing to society in my own way, using choice and democracy in my actions. I have been taught how not to behave as a human being through prolonged exposure to your workers. They treat me like a piece of dog shit, with total disdain, with no respect for my human rights. I am a piece of meat to these captors, someone who can be chucked away and forgotten while they go home on their comfy wages and bliss out in front of the television.

It’s got to stop somewhere Judith – You have to learn to leash up your workers, to keep them under control. I will not and will never submit to the authority of the mental health services in South East Wales and I will continue to honour the values that I held as a young man prior to 1997 when this nightmare began. You may get away with it every time but some day somebody somewhere will put a stop to my torture.

I expect this complaint to be dealt with promptly and effectively with suitable disciplinary measures instilled.

Regards

William Wesley Gerrard

Ps. as a result of all this mayhem I have managed to produce two new articles on the End Of Terror website that I think you should be reading http://endofterror.org

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Chief executive
Aneurin Bevan University Health Board Trust
St. Cadoc’s Hospital
Caerleon

30^th July 2016

Dear Judith Paget,

This letter follows on from my complaint from several weeks ago. I received a response saying that you had up to six months to investigate this complaint. I find this unacceptable.

Since I wrote the complaint there has been follow up from your workers and I have subsequently been detained at Talygarn under Section 3 of the Mental Health Act. This entire detention is due to the fallout from the aggression displayed by AOT in my home. I have already missed a year of my university studies due to Dr Basu, Dr Al Hasani and the care teams (now including Dr. Attwood). Being sectioned on 29^th July means that a tribunal will not convene for at least two months. My university studies are due to resume on 22^nd September 2016.

I have had enough of your mental health teams disrupting my life. I do not wish to sit at home, on the unemployed fringes of society, a static target for aggressive mental health practitioners. Whenever, I seemingly begin to piece my life together and enter mainstream society, your teams attack. It is nothing but psychiatric enslavement to which I am subjected. It has to stop.

The AOT team’s report from that initial aggressive visit was riddled with fantasy, Dr Attwood invented an incident, accusing me of sending beheading videos via Facebook to my sister in Australia. This is utterly false and both my sister and I have refuted Attwood’s claims. Social worker Linda Price needs disciplining, as do Al Hasani and Basu. They are just targeting me without reason. My mental health is in perfect condition and it is shambolic how I am detained. This situation will continue to escalate and I will resist and attack Aneurin Bevan UHB Trust through endofterror.org until I achieve satisfaction.

Surely, it is better to quit the harassment of me and to allow me to pursue my Translation (BA) studies at Cardiff University in peace?

I copied in my MP, Jessica Morden and AM, John Griffiths, to the original complaint and am hoping to achieve an independent political solution to my woes.

I wish for you to consider the escalations that have occurred and indeed will continue to occur as a result of my original complaint. I will not serve the doctors, nurses, social workers, willingly, when they are denying me all rights to function in the community as a human being.

Something must be done, and done swiftly, Judith. And you know that you have the power and capacity, to enact change. I implore you to finally act on this saga that continues to spiral out of control.
Regards,

William Wesley Gerrard

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Chief executive
Aneurin Bevan University Health Board Trust
St. Cadoc’s Hospital
Lodge Road
Caerleon
Newport
NP18 3XQ

1^st August 2016

Dear Judith,

As you are well aware I am a detained Section 3 patient at Talygarn Ward. Last week when Dr Al Hasani detained me he promised that I would have overnight leave at home with my partner and nearest relative, Nicola Edwards. Dr Al Hasani has now reneged on that promise. His superior Dr Basu has allowed me 4 hours leave daily. I was told that I could go home for those four hours. Obviously with Caldicot being a forty-five minute drive away, this four hours is not particularly suitable. I need, however, to be at home, to look after my partner, to recover from hospitalization, and to prepare for my return to university in September. On leaving the ward round meeting, I asked Keith Sullivan, Deputy Ward Manager, for a lift home to Caldicot, Keith Sullivan flatly refused so my leave will not be facilitated. There is no excuse for this.

I am being held under false pretenses. I have no health issues. After what transpired last year when Basu ignored the court ruling about my discharge, causing me to miss a full year of university, I demand now a full investigation into my case.

Regards,

William Wesley Gerrard

Chief executive
Aneurin Bevan University Health Board Trust
St. Cadoc’s Hospital
Lodge Road
Caerleon
Newport
NP18 3XQ

1^st August 2016

Dear Judith Paget,

Following on from my complaint earlier today regarding the failure of my four hour leave to Caldicot being facilitated, I write another complaint, specifically about Deputy Ward Manager, Keith Sullivan.

Firstly, I am disgusted that you continue to employ this imbecile of a man. It seems that every complaint about him is simply ignored. Healthcare to me is about providing a decent medical service and at all times your staff should be trained to be polite and courteous. Even if, like Keith, they hold personal grudges, professionalism from nurses (and doctors) is what the end user of your service expects.

As I couldn’t go to Caldicot, I went out for a couple of hours, a walk in the rain to Pontypool town centre, to meet with local friends. I returned to the ward after two hours, in time for my evening meal.

Keith Sullivan opened the doors to me, was instantly in my personal space, and demanded to conduct a full body search. Now, I have been a patient within the Aneurin Bevan UHB Mental Health services for 19 years. On PICU, they do conduct a fairly thorough search, but it is a new thing to me that full searches are now condoned on acute wards. I have watched people come and go with no such search occurring, and never, in 19 years, has one been demanded of me. I simply refused point blank, clearly expressing my views to Mr. Sullivan and accusing him of unnecessary animosity.

I am unsure of what disciplinary measures might be taken against me. I demand fair treatment. I am sure that hostile notes will be recorded in my medical file, more ammunition for Messrs Attwood, Basu and Al Hasani, no doubt. But, how is a full body search contributing to my healthcare and wellbeing? I find it intrusive, invasive and unsettling to my mental health. What I want, is for Keith Sullivan’s animosity to be nipped in the bud. I would prefer it if he was fired, or when I am a patient on Talygarn, that he is transferred to a different ward for employment. I think that he is a petty little dictator , on a power trip that needs to be curbed.
Regards,

William Wesley Gerrard

Chief Executive
Aneurin Bevan University Health Board Trust
St. Cadoc’s Hospital
Lodge Road
Caerleon
Newport
NP18 3XQ

4th August 2016

Dear Judith Paget,

I am writing to you to request a complete change in the medical staff caring for me. I wrote to you last year to remove Dr Basu and Dr Al Hasani from my care team yet nothing was done. The problem still therefore exists and this year I want it to be rectified.

Both Dr Basu and Dr Al Hasani are totally incompetent. They do not carry themselves as medical professionals and are overtly hostile to me in every aspect of my care. They are ‘extreme psychiatrists’, constantly medicating against consent and placing me on the highest possible maximum doses available to them. They withhold my leave and do not take into account my partner’s wishes. Incidentally, my partner, Nicola Marie Edwards, my fiancée, with whom I have lived for fourteen years, as my nearest relative, has been denied her right, under Section 3 of the Mental Health Act, to have me discharged. This is illegal.

Basu and Al Hasani are hostile to the point of being racist. They will never discuss the symptoms they believe me to suffer from and they openly lie, Dr Basu stating last year at a tribunal that I believed President Obama was my best friend. These doctors are liars, are irresponsible, and shouldn’t be allowed to practice at all, let alone lord over me with their ‘mighty’ powers.

Dr Basu and Al Hasani totally ignored the tribunal verdict last year which stipulated that I should be immediately released on a CTO in order for me to resume my second year of a Translation (BA) at Cardiff University. Instead they held me for the maximum 6 month duration of the Section 3. I therefore missed a whole year of my education program and now they have me again in hospital it looks likely I will have to defer my studies for another year. They are constantly putting every possible obstacle in my path and fail to recognize me as a fellow human being. They seem to perversely get kicks out of their treatment of me, often giggling in my face when they do something negative to me, knowing full well they will get away with it. They are rude, insolent and have no place in yor Trust as ‘responsible’ clinicians.

I also request that Dr Attwood be removed from my care in the community. I wish to apply for him to be struck off and will be contacting the GMC myself at the earliest available opportunity. Dr Attwood has lied to have me placed under section. He has stated that my sister, Melanie Powell, in Australia, contacted him to complain about me sending her ‘beheading videos’ on Facebook. This is a complete manifestation, a delusion on the doctor’s behalf. My sister has sent me a written statement for the courts, stipulating that she has never had contact with Dr Attwood, nor have I ever sent her beheadings videos. Beheadings videos are something I do not dwell upon. In fact, my only knowledge of them comes from the Daily Mail and Bristol Post articles on Dr Darryl Watts, who in addition to his addiction to child pornography, also had a fetish for snuff movies. I find it very bizarre how the devious psychiatrists involved in my care could plot so wickedly. Both Basu and Al Hasani seem satisfied that Dr. Attwood speaks the truth and are treating me with full force based on his imaginary evidence. The scandal involved in my care continues to grow and will provide rich material in my endofterror.org campaign against Aneurin Bevan University Health Board Trust.

I ask you how I am supposed to put faith in the professional opinions of this trio of second-rate doctors, when they so openly and blatantly lie? They may fool the courts and indeed yourself and the managers with their lies, but I assure you, that they do not pull the wool over my eyes. These men are heinous and deserve proper disciplinary action, bans from practicing and prolonged retraining. I simply refuse to accept their authority or judgments.

In addition to requesting a fully fresh team of psychiatrists, I also want rid of the Assertive Outreach Team involved in my outpatient care. I asked for them to be removed and to have Elen Macelroy, Hywel Dda social worker, to replace them. Under the guidance of Jackie Lewis they are irresponsible and hostile. They should act with more compassion in their duties and not be antagonistic and hostile. They are prepared to lie to further the goals of their psychiatrist masters.

I hope that you will swiftly replace the aforementioned medics and care teams so that the substandard service I currently receive can be upgraded to some proper professional NHS care. Incidentally, I am still waiting to see psychologist John Baird after Perry Attwell ordered Dr Basu, last year, to arrange an appointment with him for me.

I apologize for sending you a stream of letters from my captivity in Talygarn. I feel I am bringing important issues to your attention, however. Please respond in writing. If perhaps, there wasn’t a situation here of ZERO occupational therapy then maybe I’d have other constructive things to do. When yourself, Perry, Nicola and I sat down for an hour’s meeting about two years ago, I am disappointed to record that nothing at all came of that meeting. ZERO results. As Chief Executive, I remind you of your duties to service users. You have the power to implement change for the better, and you should use that power wisely. Please bring the second rate medics involved in my care into line so that you can ease my pain as a disgruntled service user.
Regards,

William Wesley Gerrard

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Chief Executive
Aneurin Bevan University Health Board Trust
St. Cadoc’s Hospital
Lodge Road
Caerleon
Newport
NP18 3XQ

8th August 2016

Dear Judith Paget,

I have already written to request a change of consultant. This letter of complaint provides more detail on the lackluster service that Dr Basu has provided me during my most recent detention. There have been no fewer than five meetings already between Basu and me. On every occasion I have asked the doctor to inform me of the symptoms he believes I am suffering from. I have also asked him to provide me with information about my future studies at Cardiff University. Being a detained patient in his care, I feel that I have a right to know his medical opinion, also how his plans are going to affect my future life and career. Basu is constantly evasive and just deflects to Dr Attwood, saying he was responsible for detaining me and it has nothing to do with Basu. Having heard this exact same argument used on five occasions I realize that Basu intends to pursue this course, like a stuck record. I have been under close observation for two weeks and as far as I’m concerned have made no slip ups. Surely, Basu must have some form of symptoms recorded or am I simply not suffering from the mental illness that he diagnoses? I am supposed to be beginning the second year of my Translation (BA) course at Cardiff University on September 22^nd 2016. Obviously, this will only be possible depending on Basu’s plans for my care. Basu doesn’t seem to recognize at all just how important this course is to me. His actions last year, when he deliberately flouted an MHRT court ruling about me being discharged, have already caused me to postpone my studies for a year. I find Basu’s outright refusal to discuss university as a breach of his medical responsibilities. I would rather some form of negative indication from him than deliberate evasive prevarication. I have been liaising with Cardiff University and also my Assembly Member, John Griffiths. Both parties are keen to learn about what provisions are being made for the continuation of my studies.

I will not continue to accept Basu being ignorant and simply burying his head in the sand when my whole life and future depends on the decisions he is making. He provides a dismal service and should not be placed in a position of responsibility at all, especially not involving me.

Basu has frozen all my leave, refusing to extend it beyond four hours daily and I don’t even get these four hours due to the constant excuses about staffing levels, despite Perry Attwell assuring me that the complaint I previously informed you about, would be resolved, and I would get my full leave.

I implore you AGAIN, to remove Dr Basu from my care.
Regards,

William Wesley Gerrard

Chief Executive
Aneurin Bevan University Health Board Trust
St. Cadoc’s Hospital
Lodge Road
Caerleon
Newport
NP18 3XQ

9th August 2016

Dear Judith Paget,

This is another complaint about Deputy Ward Manager of Talygarn, Keith Sullivan. On Sunday, 7^th August, I had arranged with the morning staff for a lift home to Caldicot for my four hours leave. Keith Sullivan was the nurse in charge of the afternoon shift. I asked Keith to facilitate my lift home and he replied that there was a staff shortage and this wouldn’t be possible, despite there being an over-abundance of working nurses. I explained that Perry Attwell had said, when resolving a previous complaint, that when staff couldn’t facilitate transport, the ward would pay for taxi fares. Keith informed me that he would not pay for taxis. I decided to ring Perry Attwell, as I have his private number. I felt bad contacting him during his weekend time off, but had no alternative. I put Perry on the phone to Keith and luckily afterwards Keith provided transport although I was only allowed home for two hours.

What annoyed me the most was that when Keith refused initially, I requested some paper from him to write a complaint. Keith refused to give me paper from the office saying that he wouldn’t let me complain about him. He sadi that he didn’t care what Judith Paget might say, adding that he was leaving the trust soon anyway, and didn’t care if he was fired so my complaints about him were irrelevant. I do not believe that someone with such a ‘laissez-faire’ attitude should be employed by the Trust.
Regards,

William Wesley Gerrard

Chief Executive
Aneurin Bevan University Health Board Trust
St. Cadoc’s Hospital
Lodge Road
Caerleon
Newport
NP18 3XQ

14th August 2016

Dear Judith Paget,

I am sure, Judith, that you are aware of http://endofterror.org This is my company and is set up to promote better practice in psychiatry. It has run for a number of years now, and increasingly I am finding that it is under direct threat from Mental Health workers in your system. Dr Basu began targeting it last year, suspending content from being posted by ordering the initial monitoring and then confiscation of my mobile internet devices. This year has proved no different. In Friday’s Doctor meeting, where Perry Attwell, Manager, was present, Basu ordered that should, over the duration of the weekend’s home leave, I post on @endofterror twitter or do a full website blog post, then my leave will be immediately rescinded and I will be recalled to hospital and have future leave revoked. I get a lot of support from the public, politicians and journalists through End Of Terror and I find it therapeutic. I feel that Dr Basu is acting illegally by directly confronting this business. He is breaching ‘freedom of speech’ legislation and I should be free to use the Internet how I choose, in particular in my own home. Apparently social worker, Linda Price, who classifies my 14 year relationship as a delusion, objects to me tweeting about her, having put in an official complaint. It is interesting to note that, from her holiday, she manages to monitor the @endofterror tweets, yet she is unable to address her boss, Steve Woods, or my solicitor, Mr. Confrey, as to the role of my nearest relative. The nearest relative is of course my partner, Nicola Edwards, by law, even if Linda Price illegally claims otherwise. The fact of the matter is that my whole detention is provably illegal yet Linda Price wants to continue to flout her power and illegally clamp down on legitimate business activities. ie. End Of Terror.

I would like for you to formally write to me to inform me of how and why the Mental Health Act can be used to suppress freedom of speech on the Internet. I would like all conditions on my internet usage to be lifted and for Dr Basu and Linda Price to be reprimanded.

I thank you, in advance, for responding to this complaint hastily and with the full force of your executive powers.
Regards,

William Wesley Gerrard

Chief Executive
Aneurin Bevan University Health Board Trust
St. Cadoc’s Hospital
Lodge Road
Caerleon
Newport
NP18 3XQ

28th August 2016

Dear Judith Paget,

I am currently being injected with 50mg Modecate fortnightly on Dr Basu’s orders. This is treatment against my consent. I am allergic to Modecate like I am with every other depot injection. I am vomiting 15-20 times a day and cannot focus at all to do my studies. I cannot eat due to the vomiting and the sickness I have from this treatment is incredible. When you factor in that Dr Attwood has initially lied and made up my symptoms prior to treatment, I trust that you will empathize with my view that a healthy individual has been taken and made sick by mental health treatment.

I have tried explaining these symptoms to Dr Basu so that something can be done but Basu just brushes them aside saying that I must have an underlying physical sickness and he tries to refer me to the GP. Both Nicola and I know from multiple previous occasions that it is the depot medication treatment causing this sickness as once the depot stops the sickness disappears. Also, the GP, Dr P Gedman, will do nothing to stand up to the psychiatrists. He may be able to prescribe some gastro-intestinal medication such as Olanzoprazole to help ease the pain of vomiting but he will not stop the psychatrists from pursuing their depot medication goals, goals which I truly do not comprehend. In the past both neurologists and gastro-intestinal specialists have concluded that my illness is due to the depot injections and that they should be stopped but psychiatrists act as a law unto themselves.

I want Basu disciplined for failing to deal with the sickness he is causing me through his treatment. I am supposedly being discharged on Tuesday so hopefully these depot injections will stop at that point and I will be able to regain my lost fitness and resume my studies at Cardiff University. The psychiatrists should not be allowed to inflict pain and torture upon their patients.

I hope that you will be able to hastily and satisfactorily deal with my latest complaint.
Regards,

William Wesley Gerrard

Chief Executive
Aneurin Bevan University Health Board Trust
St. Cadoc’s Hospital
Lodge Road
Caerleon
Newport
NP18 3XQ

Tuesday, 30th August 2016

Dear Judith Paget,

For the past two weeks in ward round meetings Dr Basu has been giving me today’s date as a final discharge date. My partner, Nicola Edwards, had a meeting regarding her role as nearest relative, with social services manager, Steve Woods, at Hywel Dda Centre, Chepstow, last Wednesday, where Steve stated that the nearest relative problem would be redundant as of today as Basu intended to discharge me, thus making the position of nearest relative irrelevant.

What actually transpired at today’s meeting was that rather than discharging me, Basu instead revoked all my leave and, after spending the past two weeks or so at home, I have been forcibly redetained in Talygarn, with no leave even to the local shop. I want to know why Dr Basu has lied outrightly to Nicola, Steve Woods and myself. I am supposed to be attending university on 19^th September and any plans I make towards this goal are thwarted by Dr Basu and Dr Attwood. Dr Attwood was indeed present at today’s meeting which I believe did not help the situation. Attwood accused me of being aggressive which is a falsehood as it was him and Basu that reduced my partner to tears in the meeting. Attwood claims that I am prepared to complain about anything. He dismissed my complaints as nonsensical and openly mocked me. When I told Attwood that I had applied to the General Medical Council (GMC) for him to be struck off he accused me of threatening him.

Are the Aneurin Bevan doctors that powerful that they are exempt from any complaints procedure? Are they above the auspices of the GMC? Who will rein in their misperceived omnipotence?

The reason given for my renewed detention were that Doctor Attwood disbelieves that I am vomiting 15-20 times a day on the current 50 mg Modecate depot injection. He said that he didn’t want me claiming this at tribunal and I was to be kept in hospital to ‘prove my vomit’.

I have a sick bowl at home and the care of a trained nurse in Nicola. I have been doing well back in the community and completely begrudge being held here just to satisfy Basu and Attwood’s curiosity. Since I was readmitted this afternoon I have vomited 9 ties which has been documented by staff yet it wasn’t until I saw Dr Rankin later in the day that some form of medical examination was attempted. Basu has actually increased the depot injection Modecate to 100mg for tomorrow, a doubling of the dose and the maximum dose allowed of this medication. Is this a wise medical decision? At some point I wish for medical ethics to be considered with regard to the aggressive ‘extreme psychiatry’ I experience at the hands of your doctors. After 19 years of treatment against my consent I fully appreciate how far psychiatrists are prepared to bend the rules and test the limits of their power.

Well, now I guess the question of my attendance at university has been settled. Your doctors have won for another year and have yet again thwarted my life plans.

As my partner correctly pointed out to Basu and Attwood, why now after 19 years of my allergy to depot injections causing me to vomit, have they suddenly decided it warrants close hospital observation? Why now am I detained, a such a critical point of my university preparations?

Two weeks ago when 50mg Modecate was injected against my consent, I went home and had a bad reaction. I started seeing shapes appear across the left side of my vision which clouded over, blocking my sight. I was hyperventilating and had to calm down in bed. I spent about an hour on the phone to NHS Direct who wanted to send an ambulance for me to be admitted to Accident & Emergency. I also experienced heart palpitations and irregularities. I just wish that when you use non-consensual treatment it wasn’t so damned dangerous and life threatening. The dosage of this drug has now been doubled so God only knows how badly I’ll be faring tomorrow. I’d love to know the medical justification of this.

I would like you to examine why Dr Basu lied about my discharge and also why they are becoming aggressive due to me utilizing the complaints procedure. I believe that doctors bullying patients is not the way forward for the NHS.
Regards,

William Wesley Gerrard

Chief Executive
Aneurin Bevan University Health Board Trust
St. Cadoc’s Hospital
Lodge Road
Caerleon
Newport
NP18 3XQ

Monday, 5th September 2016

Dear Judith Paget,

On Wednesday, 31st August, nurses Gabrielle Gwyther and Olu Alcanvo, administered, against my consent, 100 mg Modecate depot injection. I had asked them both to check with NHS direct about my symptoms from when 50mg was administered two weeks previously due to the bad reaction I had experienced. They refused to do this, stating that because the doctor had written it up they had to give it.

Ten minutes after the administration of the drug I had a seizure in the smoking area. It was consistent with the previous seizures I have had whilst on high doses of depot injection. Involuntary head movements and loss of control of my tongue. I reported the seizure immediately to Olu and Gaby and they just laughed in my face. Olu said he had been watching on the video camera and it wasn’t a seizure – presumably he thinks I faked it? He said that the medication was a long-acting drug and couldn’t possibly cause seizures of any kind, certainly not so quickly.

I went on to have three more minor seizures in the smoking area, some witnessed by patients. I went to the nurse’s station and they were all crowded around the TV monitors roaring with laughter. Olu, who couldn’t stop giggling said he was glad I was having seizures. I had no medial treatment whatsoever, and was refused access to the Ward doctor.

I find that the employment of staff who are prepared to openly laugh at your medical problems and do nothing at all to remedy your situation should be terminated. There is no excuse on this issue and I expect Olu and Gaby to both be fired.

I presume that yet again for another year I will not be referred to the neurologist. These psychiatric drugs are causing me brain damage which is what seizures indicate. It is a real shame that Aneurin Bevan are prepared to cause illness and then fail to treat the subsequent medical issues.
Regards,

William Wesley Gerrard

Chief Executive
Aneurin Bevan University Health Board Trust
St. Cadoc’s Hospital
Lodge Road
Caerleon
Newport
NP18 3XQ

Monday, 12th September 2016

Dear Judith Paget,

I wish to report Dr Basu for again wasting my time today, lying and leading me to false hope. After the fiasco two weeks ago when he had arranged to discharge me but failed to do so Dr Basu arranged for me to come in to his ward round today, telling me beforehand that he would be discharging me on a CTO, ahead of the resumption of my university studies on the 19^th September. Following a prolonged meeting with Steve Woods, head of social services, Basu again decided to renege on his word and failed to discharge me. Basu was wanted to illegally subvert the conditions of the CTO whereby he could force me to take the depot injections with threat of hospital recall if I refuse. These are not mandatory conditions of a CTO and are non-mandatory additions he is making to subvert the Mental Health Act. I had intended to be free of the depot injections that make me so violently ill ahead of returning to university but now Dr Basu will be using the full powers of his under my Section 3 detainment to administer depot injections against my consent.

It is clear to me Judith that you are showing a blatant disregard for my complaints by the lack of haste you use in addressing them. Perhaps if Aneurin Bevan University Health Board’s complaints procedure was more robust and fulfilling, then maybe this whole nightmare scenario would by now be over. I do hope that you will seriously consider ALL my complaints as these doctors and staff who I complain about are free to do what they want at present to other patients and myself. These dissidents need to be brought into line.
Regards,

William Wesley Gerrard

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Chief Executive
Aneurin Bevan University Health Board
Headquarters
St Cadoc’s Hospital
Lodge Road
Caerleon
Newport
NP18 3XQ

Wednesday, 14^th December 2016

Dear Judith Paget,

I have received your response to my complaints dated 21 November 2016. Please excuse my tardiness in replying to your response as I have been completing my Autumn Term at Cardiff University. I have now finished for Christmas and have the time available to deal with this ongoing matter.

When I wrote you the litany of complaints it was in the hope of achieving some worthwhile change within the system that would benefit not just myself but other service users. I feel that your response was very light-hearted, lightweight and left virtually every issue I identified as unaddressed. It seems that you are not interested in the views of end users of the Mental Health Service and that you just wish to maintain the status quo of your staff treating patients in a subhuman inhumane manner. I have subsequently asked the Ombudsman to intervene and I’m sure he’ll be in contact in due course. I am also keeping my AM John Griffiths and MP Jessica Morden in the loop so I do not regard the matter as closed. Rather, having read your response I feel that something ought to definitely be done to address the local mental health system. You need to look from management down and address the fundamental building blocks that so fracture this system. If no change occurs when it has been clearly identified then the system is in an archaic state and that system will rust into disrepair. What you have in Talygarn and St Cadoc’s is a corrupt and decadent system where so much has been allowed by management to run out of control for years. This produces a very unhealthy environment for service users and one which cannot easily be fixed. Doctors, nurses, social workers, they all run amok and they all fully know that management will turn a blind eye to any misdeeds. The staff get lazy and decadent and do not devote their work to the end user. They are all looking out for number one, doing just enough for their jobs and protecting themselves, without sticking their heads on the line to question the flaws in the system and improve the local mental health units, to bring them into line for what twenty-first century hospitals should be.

When looking through your response I cannot see an individual point where you feel that I am correct and right in feeling aggrieved with the system. There are plenty of lapsadaisy excuses in your response, plenty of instances where you fully believe that the correct procedures were followed by your staff.

I was locked up for no reason at all, taken from my own home, put into a hospital cell and kept to fester at the amusement of Dr Basu and Dr Attwood for a period of months. I was taken out of preparations for my university course and removed from my loving relationship. If all this was just and good and necessary then why did the Mental Health Review Tribunal when it finally sat, find in my favor? You have to ask yourself a question at this point. If a court of law can find a problem then why cannot management find a problem? It’s not as if I didn’t persevere and put in a lot of hard work, whilst under duress in hospital, to produce the complaints in the first place.

The Assertive Outreach team began being aggressive with me at a prior meeting when Dr Attwood was not present yet you find that Dr Attwood had correctly identified mental illness in me. If you read the very first complaint I wrote to you, that clearly shows that Dr Attwood was not involved at that point as I wrote to you before we had met.

I was accused of sending beheadings videos to my sister and I have in writing evidence from my sister saying that this is a complete falsehood. Perhaps a woman claiming to be my sister rang the assertive outreach team but it certainly wasn’t Melanie. I cannot see how anybody is following a Professional Code of Conduct when they are creating fictitious false accusations. You’ve opened the door for mental health professionals to say just about anything about a prospective patient with no recriminations. This is so fundamentally wrong and such a critical point that I cannot accept being locked away for something I simply haven’t done nor would dream of doing. I can fully well see that the mental health system struggles with the digital age – the internet and social media – as do many other industries. Yet to allow people to invent fictitious facebook stories when evidence can be produced to back up any counter-claim, this is a bad omen for the future of your service.

I’m dragged halfway across Wales to your hospital, well away from my home, friends and family and yet it is satisfactory that I cannot have leave, unlike every other patient on the ward. Eventually after persisting I did get leave and was thankful but it is not an area where I should be fighting in the first place.

Keith Sullivan searched me fully or attempted to, knowing fully that he was doing it to just annoy me. This is t the purpose of a search and Keith searched no other patients or visitors entering the ward. Keith is cantankerous and abused his power fully when he was working for your system. A truly terrible embarrassment of a man and a nurse.

I do not wish to hear management excuses about why I cannot change physician. I want to see whatever physician I choose irrespective of their workload or other commitments or whether or not they fancy the challenge of dealing with me. I feel it is a right for a patient in any form of healthcare to choose their doctor. In mental health where treatment against consent predominates it seems as though the doctors are the ones with the true power to choose their patients. This is wrong. I do not recognize either Dr Basu or Dr Attwood as responsible clinicians or indeed as my responsible clinician.I will refuse or future contact with both men and their vile, despicable treatments. You have to provide doctors for patients and not patients for doctors.

I think that the real reason nothing was followed up following our meeting two years ago is that you do not value patient input and couldn’t care a less for what an end user experiences in your system. You have a system that you are not interested in improving or you would be consulting all patients properly and adjusting the system according to the feedback. Mr Attwell may say that attempts were made t work with me but I can assure you that no attempts were made.

I struggled to cope in university all term as I missed out on the key preparation time I had identified that I needed prior to attending university as I was experiencing yet another Talygarn debacle.

Linda Price told me I’d been detained for sending beheadings videos and that was that. Basu or Attwood both denied to open up to explain further why I had been detained. This is deeply unsatisfactory and is a situation where each of the protagonists is lending a hand to help the other out during the investigation. If passing the buck satisfies your management criteria then so be it,but I feel that a large NHS Trust should be run professionally and the investigation should uncover sinister errors.

Nicola is a joint tenant fact. Whatever paperwork Linda Price may or may not have doe not justify ordering my partner out of her home. According to Linda Price, Nicola is not even my partner. It all fits conveniently when you weigh up how much my treatment depends on treatment against consent but in the real world Linda and her comrades should be disciplined for breach of professional ethics. I never want to see Linda Price anywhere near my home again. She is most certainly an unwelcome intruder.

How can my website be part of a mental health condition? Dr Basu should worry less about his name on the internet and worry more about his patients. Dr Basu had been stalking me online for some time and I have proven this despite his objections. You should supervise the use of the internet by psychiatrists. I need not bring up the example of Dr Darryl Watts to illustrate the necessity of this point.

I still have a critical hiatus hernia which is being untreated by the NHS, caused directly by Basu’s use of depot injections. His notes of a gradual improvement in mental health are medical proof that his treatment is good and works? Be a bit more scientific please. Since I’ve been off the injections my health has improved dramatically so that I can study and attend university. This would have been impossible had I stayed on the injections and lost in court. Basu and Attwood are old school in using depot injections as punishment for dissidents. Depot injections and treatment against consent are two of the biggest flaws in modern psychiatry and why it will never be a true science.

Dr Basu was breaching the law and this was clearly pointed out by Steve Woods as he tried to manipulate CTO law to hold me in his grasp. I truly thank God for my solicitor Mr Confrey, who was successfully able to steer the Tribunal into making a just and correct decision.

I would like you to look at my points and reassess your entire investigation as I feel that he first attempt at dealing with my complaints was most unsuccessful and leaves the service in a poorer state than it was before I was last admitted. People’s lives are on the line in a frontline mental health care environment and by Christ I’ve witnessed enough deaths within the system caused by the malpractice and neglect of clinical staff. It’s about time you brought this whole shambles of a system into the present age. This is not Bedlam and the people of South Wales shouldn’t have to accept the shambles that you run. I am truly thankful to be away from the system and hope never to return although I’ve a feeling that my detractors – the enemies in the system – are too much of a multitude for my stay away to be permanent.
Regards

William Wesley Gerrard

Customer Relations Team,
Monmouthshire County Council,
PO Box 106
Caldicot
Monmouthshire
NP26 9AN

8th August 2016

Dear sir / madam,

This is a complaint about Monmouthshire Social Worker, Linda Price. Linda Price is an odious woman, who has harassed me using the Mental Health Act, over a number of years, consistently abusing her power. On 26/07/16, Linda Price, as AMP, attended my address and with the support of police and psychiatrists, removed me to Talygarn, where she subsequently sectioned me under the Mental Health Act. Linda Price identified my father as nearest relative, I believe deliberately. She knows that my parental relationship has broken down and that she can exercise her powers more with the support of my father, than if she had to seek the approval from my nearest relative, partner and fiancée, Nicola Marie Edwards. Nicola and I have lived together in a loving relationship for fourteen years and have been engaged for ten years. Under Mental Health Act law, as Nicola and I have been cohabiting for over six months prior to my detention, she is automatically classed as my nearest relative. Linda Price has told a massive lie that I uncovered today through speaking to Abergavenny-based social worker, Steve Woods. Linda claims that on 26/07/16, during a consultation with my partner, Nicola, that Nicola told her we weren’t in a relationship, we weren’t engaged and we had not been living together. This is pure fantasy on Linda’s behalf. It is not a simple oversight but a maliciously schemed plan to enforce the power granted to her by the Mental Health Act.

Linda Price made no attempt at a private consultation with Nicola on the 26/07/16 and indeed, after I had been removed from my property, ordered Nicola to leave the property, despite it being a joint tenancy in both our names. Nicola stayed at the property as she was rightly entitled to do.

Linda has persisted in insisting that Nicola is not my nearest relative and refuses to back down. This has created a whole host of problems with Mental Health Act Administration and also my legal team. I should have been discharged from hospital last Friday after Nicola applied for me to be released which is what she is entitled to do as my nearest relative under the Mental Health Act.

Linda Price needs disciplining. She should be forced to recognize my fourteen year relationship, be forced to apologize to Nicola and myself for lying, and should have all her responsibilities as an AMP removed, so that she may not perpetuate any further injustices as a social worker in Monmouthshire. I demand a full investigation into this abominable dragon of a woman and as any delay in investigation adds to the burden of my detention, I implore you to act speedily in resolving this issue.
Regards,

William Wesley Gerrard

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Hamster Disorder

Let me introduce a new character on the doctor front. Dr. Agniezsca Tyson, or Agi, is a Polish female acute psychiatrist employed by Aneurin Bevan University Health Board. She works out of the Hywel Dda Centre in Chepstow and is head of psychiatry for Lower Monmouthshire. She is also a lecturer in Psychiatry at Cardiff University thus bringing the new generation of mental health employees up to scratch. Agi has a command role within the local police and they have to attend regular briefing and meetings at Hywel Dda. I think she relies far too heavily on the fear factor her surname induces with it also being that of the fearsome world champion boxer, Mike Tyson. A world champion, Agi isn’t.

I was transferred to Tyson against my consent after the previous Sri Lankan psychiatrist managing me, Dr. Nirmalie Mirando, retired. Never keen, as the Chepstow shrinks are usually a lot worse than the Newport ones and the general staff they employ are totally militant and more obnoxious than the average mental health worker. Almost automatically I ended up feeling the full force of Tyson. I filed multiple reports of attempted murder against her with the police and over the several years she acted upon me it was a truly frightening experience. Eventually, Tyson transferred me into the care of convicted child sex offender Gwent Police-employed forensic psychiatrist, Dr Darryl Watts (see category http://endofterror.org/?cat=191 ). I was ‘under’ her from around 2006-2010 and fought every second of the way to be transferred away from her grasp.

When my partner, Nicola, lost our unborn child in the womb (due to her enforced mental health drug treatment regime), we decided we would bring some life into our home by getting some family pets. A kind neighbour gave us our first hamster, ‘Rafa’ or ‘littly’. I bought a nice cage complex for our living room and our friends and us had hours of fun with a whole mass of roaming Roborovsky dwarf hamsters. Yes, our front room became the Gobi desert away from home, but these creatures are magnificent and they were well looked after and bred really well.
Obviously the psychiatric establishment (who you are forced by law to enter your home regularly) disapproved. When a whole industry is based so heavily on the inhumane torture of rodents it is no wonder that well-looked after hamster pets are an anathema. I disagree with scientific testing on animals wholeheartedly.

Pretty soon, I got a new diagnosis added to me medical sheets. Tyson brandished me with ‘hamster disorder’. Obviously I felt she was deranged and couldn’t understand how this new illness to me fitted into the DSM. I made some enquiries next time I was among sane people. I casually mentioned to a female music industry friend and associate next time I was at one of my artist’s studios in Cardiff. I often tell people about some of the nonsense I put up with in this mental health system. It helps to have normal people’s advice. Kath explained to me that ‘hamster disorder’ was in actual fact a real medical condition ans warned me that I shouldn’t perhaps be quite too blasé about this new condition and that I certainly shouldn’t be so casual in revealing it to people, especially strangers.

I was a little concerned at Kath’s tone of voice as I realised that she was being serious. She got out the laptop and quickly googled a page for me too show exactly why she was concerned. Most of my friends knew how much our hamsters meant to me and I really wish I hadn’t investigated my new diagnosis. It turns out that hamster disorder actually refers to a sexual fetish whereby ‘people’ get pleasure by inserting live hamsters up their rectal passages. Obviously, I hit the roof just to know the cheek of this woman doctor, Agi Tyson, to have actually accused me of bestiality with my family pets. Things went even further downhill from then on. I was soon kidnapped and taken away to the mental hospital. Tyson tended to use Talygarn Ward at Griffithstown County Hospital in Pontypool. While she injected me with medicines to which I have an allergy over a period of months, the council-employed rat-catchers were sent out to my home to lay down traps everywhere and exterminate my family pets.

Just to set the record straight, I do not suffer from hamster disorder and I do not indulge in bestiality of any kind. I do resent the diagnosis from Tyson and I do resent the false accusations. I resent the police involvement in enforcing the mental health act and I resent to be treated for this ‘illness’. I do agree it is a sick condition and I don’t care if Hollywood stars have been afflicted with it. My hamsters were well-looked after and Nicola and I loved having them be part of our lives for several enjoyable years. Psychiatry is sick and it is that which needs to be eradicated, not animals.

Police Brutality and Mental Health – PART 3

I’ve written two articles already on policing and mental health. The impact of this particular episode still hasn’t quite sunk in. Bang out of order is obviously one of my judgements. Equally, writing this blog, just knowing firsthand exactly what the British police are capable of, means that my life is in potential danger as something equally as bad or worse could quite easily happen at any time.

I was just reading a fellow DJ’s Facebook about returning home to a key UK airport to see heavily armed police officers ‘greeting’ people as they got off the plane. OK. We may be on whatever alert, but I do passionately disagree with the arming of the police. Unless laws are passed for the general public to have the right to bear arms, it is unfair to arm a civilian force. Army and other military services, by all means, weapons are a necessity. But not the police. They do not have responsible enough a mentality to be given the easy power over life and death that a trigger brings. I speak from experience.

If you actually ever look at the mental health act, when you are admitted to a hospital or sectioned, you are supposed to go through a process of assessment. There are balances and checks in place. I do believe that the process is unfair as it stands. However, over the years the mental health system has been opening up to allow the police more and more involvement and they more or less have a free reign today. The ‘Place Of Safety’ in the legislation allows them to use their premises as mental hospital holding cells. As soon as I heard of the police being armed with tasers I was against the idea. I don’t believe that any form of weapon can be safely deemed as providing non-lethal force, in particular a ballistic weapon. it is no surprise to me that there are so many deaths caused by tasers.

I was spending the evening in my home studio, making music. I use Ableton and have various MIDI instruments that plug into it. I was having a quiet jam on my keyboard and laying down the foundations of a new tune. It’s quite a creative process, making music and is very tranquil and relaxing as a producer, although repetitively listening to the same beat patterns as you build up a track from scratch can be frustrating for other people to listen to. My missus has to put up with a lot of this. On that particular evening, she decided to pop out to see her friend down the road. Nicola went and I carried on making music. I powered down the studio for a while and went out to the kitchen to grab a bite to eat. I was in my dressing gown, as I often am at home. As I returned from the kitchen into my living room, all of a sudden I felt a jolt and these wires seemed to be coming out of nowhere at me. I looked down and I had some sharp metallic objects in my heart, with cables attached that were whirling around and heading for me. I immediately, AND I MEAN IMMEDIATELY, ripped at my chest to remove these objects. The wires came flying out and scattered away, off to my left. I had thought I was alone in the flat. I couldn’t get these metal rods out of my chest. Suddenly there was a clatter at the front door as it was being forced open. I ran over to the door, opened it quickly as the intruders were trying to break in and strongly slammed it shut on the intruders and double locked it. They couldn’t get in.

I still had the metal in my chest and wanted it out. It was in my heart, two tiny rods of aluminium-looking, man-made material, with bits of plastic and other junk attached. I knew who the intruders were now, as obviously, I had seen them when I shut the door. It was the police. They now had a battering ram to the door and were attempting to force it; yet couldn’t. They couldn’t muster the strength. There was a hell of a noise coming from them. Lots of shouting and panic. I was alone in my home and I have to say, was truly scared. This was a life or death situation. I took and air rifle pellet in my backside as a kid but this was the first time I had been shot with a gun. I finally just ripped at the metal and they were barbed, fish-hook like prongs that were retaining the rods in my chest. They were almost impossible to remove. I realised that it was a taser that had been fired at me and was thanking my lucky stars that I had managed to rip the wires out prior to the post-impact electric shock being discharged. The idiots had not only randomly shot an unarmed man, minding his own business, in his own home, but they had also misfired their own weapon. I didn’t have any weapons in my home to defend myself and was left to the mercy of what happened when they eventually got in. Alone, with no witnesses, the panic set in. I had removed the metal as best I could and realised that I wasn’t going to die from the first shot. Blood was gushing out of the open wound and it bloody well stung, like never before. It’s a truly horrible feeling, reminded me of how you feel inside your body, under the cosh of the biological weapons they use in mental health treatment. It’s just that this was exterior, on the body, and not inside.

I decided that I needed to inform the public in order to protect myself. I was still trying to figure out how they had shot the weapon. They weren’t inside the house. Either they had fired through the open front window or had fired through the letter box. Either way, there was no warning, either in human voice or any noise at all. I knew they had tried to assassinate me and I just didn’t want to be a random statistic of police murder. I looked out the front room window and, there was, I’d estimate, about 50 or so police officers. All in uniform, milling around. I screamed at the top of my lungs: “HELP!!!” “I’ve Been Shot!” – I felt that I had to let people know. In a life or death situation you have tremendous power in your voice. Despite having a serious traumatic injury to my chest, I shouted louder than I’d ever shouted before. I decided that I would scream the neighbourhood, the whole town, down. I thought of every person I knew nearby, and others in the locality further afield. I was even screaming to friends far away in London, lest my voice should carry as far as it seemed to be able to. Members of the public started to gather and the police were sort of shepherding them around and trying to clear the vicinity. I knew they were up for another pop at me that night. Someone suggested that I jump out of the window but I didn’t really fancy flying out of the flats into a bunch of armed police for obvious safety reasons. There were witnesses now to me being alive. I decided to go off to my bedroom and try to relax in bed. They were still bashing hell out of the door and it would give at any moment. I felt that even the most heartless copper ain’t just going to shoot an unarmed man, naked in his own bed, in cold blood. I lay in bed, pretty sure that my time on this planet was coming to a close. I heard the front door give and was just hoping that the duvet would protect against any further taser shots. I’ve taken a full mains electric shock before, whilst setting up DJ equipment, and electric shocks are not pleasant. Your heart has a weakness after one full shock and is never quite the same.

It took ages for them to open the bedroom door after entering the building. I could hear loads of noise. Movement of people. Suddenly a plastic shield came through the door and hordes of riot police stormed into my bedroom, their shiny metal helmets peaking above the heavy-duty reinforced, hardened plastic riot shields. I’d never been in a riot or demonstration so had only ever seen riot police on TV or in photographs or internet videos. They surrounded the bed with their shields protecting them completely. I was just glad that they hadn’t shot me and I couldn’t see any weapons. I just stayed calm and quiet and then about 8 of them just dived on me, riots shields down, and were trying to squash / suffocate me. They just bounced off me really and it was a non-effective whatever-it-was-supposed-to-be. They all seemed pretty much in a right panic. Eventually, one broke the silence and I realised he was Scottish.

I said ‘Hi, Are you Scottish?’

He said ‘Yes’

I said ‘Where are you from’.

He said ‘Glasgow’

I said ‘Ah, you’ve come a long way.’ Do you support Rangers or Celtic?’

He said, rather proudly, ‘Rangers’

Being a Liverpool fan, there are a lot of links between Rangers and Celtic and our club. I just started having a conversation with this guy from out of town as his mates continued to act silly with their weapons etc. I have to be fair to this guy. He did look a bit shocked and disillusioned with the whole situation.

Someone else took command as they did some sort of hold on me and started lifting me out of bed. They have manoevres, these riot police and I was surrounded by large plastic shields at all times. As I was naked they decided it was appropriate to get me dressed. It’s a surreal experience, I can tell you. Watching a bunch of armed, grown men with plastic shields and helmets and sparkly badges with ‘police’ on, fish around your bedroom, while you’re naked, boxed in by plastic, with blood pissing out of your chest from a misfired taser. I explained to the guy, that the Bermuda Shorts he dug out of my drawer. just didn’t fit me. I hadn’t worn them since I was about 12. I was trying to help the situation. stay calm, release the pressure. Talk to a copper on duty though and they think you’re trying to be smart. They got heavy handed and were forcing me into the shorts. In the end, as we had now shuffled into my living room, a couple of them realised that the shorts just weren’t going on and it wasn’t the best thing to do to a man in his own home, forcibly dress him into child’s clothes. I just kept saying softly, ‘just let me put the shorts on’ They were petrified and trying to cover up what was obviously quite an extreme incident. Someone managed to fetch another pair of shorts from back in the bedroom. I was getting frustrated because they were in my living room causing havoc. They broke my computer system, my studio monitor speakers and ripped all my wiring out. Just out-and-out criminal vandals. I cannot believe how inhumane these people are. Eventually I had a pair of surf shorts on. It was a freezing cold night. I was bleeding, been shot in the chest, attacked by riot police and now I was to be dragged into the middle of my neighbourhood in the dead of night in a pair of surf shorts. Not very practical, Mr Policeman, really? Simple health training. Normally when someone is shot, first aid is applied, especially if the weapon has, perhaps, misfired? They seemed more keen on removing the remnants of the taser in my front room than anything else. Bloody wires everywhere.

If their idea of helping a shot human is to help him get dressed in his old shorts, then they really need to go back to the drawing board. Emergency services? it’s no wonder we have so many bloody disasters in this country. They are incompetent. It’s just inappropriate. How are this lot supposed to deal with an actual riot where the people are actually committed to achieving their aims? They don’t even understand how to get dressed? I can just picture police across the country waking up every morning for mummy to slip on their pants for them and help them get to the potty toilet. They couldn’t blow out a candle with a fire extinguisher: the idiots!

Outside the property, and there were lots of people. The fear for my life hadn’t quite dissipated. Obviously, when you are being kidnapped after being shot, the fear doesn’t erode at all really. Until I get home to my bedroom after the whole charade, however much time it takes, everything is by force, and everyone can be regarded as an unnatural encounter.

Back of the van. I just zoned out in the van. The pain in my heart was great and I know that I was at risk of heart failure. I was not aware of any rulebook to guide you from, when you are shot. It doesn’t help that you aren’t getting immediate medical assistance and I will be eternally grateful to the police for that. Handcuffed (incidentally they went on back in the bedroom – yet still they had to crush me with the riot shields), I was banged into the back of a van. A long time to get going as they were doing their ‘hush, hush, nice police in front of the public operation’ to ease the crowded streets into believing that they were somehow doing some form of fitful employment and public service.

By the time we reached our destination, I just felt like it would be safer to feign unconsciousness and just to fall out of the back of the van when the doors opened, just in case there were any surprises awaiting. It’s a complete bastard, having an open chest wound with shrapnel remnants in it and being handcuffed behind your back, unable to tend to your own wounds. We were at the Royal Gwent hospital in Newport and I was wheel-chaired in to a new little corner of it, shall we say ‘the police’s special room’. The Royal Gwent is a good hospital and I’ve had top notch treatment there over the years. All the time. Except on this occasion. In ‘police corner’ you get junior nurses who do not understand how to use expensive heart monitoring equipment. You get crazed coppers running the whole show. I do not believe that I met a trained doctor throughout the whole incident. It was like some sort of twisted perverted medical saga. They seemed to be getting some sort of thrill by pretending that they were actual nurses. There were two male police officers, quite young, probably the same age as myself, maybe a little younger. One of them was quiet and didn’t speak. the other just kept repeatedly, in a sort of spaced out drone-like mantra, saying. ‘Hi Wesley, I’m your friend!’ He repeated it about 300 times that night. I might have possibly seen the guy once before on a police mental hospital kidnap operation, But i have never spoken to him at all in my life. Never once met him. I don’t know who the hell he is. He’s not my friend. Talk about stalkers! I’m repeatedly asking him to un-cuff me so that I can get medical attention and at the very least tend to myself. I just thought this guys is just so unbelievably sick that I don’t know how I am going to every have faith in the human species again. They were just sort of mincing around, waiting for me to die, in some way of ‘natural causes’. I was detained at this hospital for seemingly forever. then i got bundled back in the van. no medical care at all. Nor medical staff to explain anything and i was just being rotated around by two clueless policemen in full uniform with handcuffs on and some gaping wounds which by now and ceased oozing of their own accord.

It was the short journey to their gaff now. At this stage I was just hoping they’d take me to St. Cadocs’. Whereas, at St. Cad’s there are plenty of ex-police officers on the nursing staff, at least they don’t parade around in uniform and I actually know some of the nursing staff quite well, enough to have a sensible occasional human-to-human conversation.

Back in ‘police world’ I was escorted into Newport Central and, finally, the cuffs were removed. I just couldn’t believe I was alive. My body was numb with shock and I had shooting pains in every direction. I felt never more in need of a medic in my entire life. I was put in a cell with no camera and weirdly they left the door open. The same two police stayed outside the cell all night and I was just walking back and for, in and out of the cell, trying to speak to them, as when they are on their own turf they settle right down and are far less weird than in public. I just tried persuading them to just call it a day and take me home to my missus who used to be a nurse and we could all forget about the little incident earlier. Obviously police don’t quite grasp the reality or the impact they have on people and it was a no-go zone.

I knew I wasn’t getting medical attention and it is imperative that you somehow calm down. I eventually got an hour of snooze on the cell bench. I wasn’t keen on having an open door as I slept,. Especially with two police outside. After all that had occurred. But, survival is survival, I guess.

Next day, transfer to Beechwood secure ward, St. Cadoc’s Hospital, Caerleon. And this is the point where I object, based on what has come to light to me in the past month. I am handed over by the police to a police-employed forensic psychiatrist who will treat me for mental illness against my consent for an indeterminable period. Dr Darryl Watts (see full details here… ) sectioned me under the mental health act immediately. I had zero physical medical attention for my injuries., this man is a convicted felon. Now it’s all very well me banging on about his child sex convictions. I am not a child and we live in a world where there are paedophiles. Deal with it. What alarms me is, that, when you read the articles about his sick habits in the papers, it isn’t just child porn he fetishes about. He is into extreme violence and some weird conspiracy sort of nonsense. He is a dangerous man, who is unreformed as he has never served any time and been punished for his convictions. He does not understand remorse and is a danger to society.. A long time after this whole escapade, I was told off the record by an off-duty policeman, in the knowing loop, that Dr Darryl Watts had ordered the whole taser operation on me.

To see these police charge into my home, rip my life apart another time, attempt to murder me and realise they are all doing it on the orders and advice of a 30 hour a week child porn addict….. Where indeed does this place the British legal system? Yes, Watts won several hearings again this time in Mental Health Review Tribunal Courts. What sort of world is it that I can be judged ill in the head when these people are just not natural at all, nor human?

A long time has passed since then and I’m recovering from the scars. I still wonder the trajectory of the weapon. I’d love to come face to face with whoever pulled the trigger. See what sort of person that they actually are. Not that I’ll ever know.

On a quiet note, just to bring some rationale back, to myself as much as anything…. I can remember when I was taught how to use firearms. On a farm in New Zealand, my mother’s family farm, out in the country, outside Wanganui: My Uncle Johnny took me out hunting. He taught me how to use a shotgun and I took a rabbit – they are pests on the farmland in NZ. It’s a dark feeling post-trigger, and seeing an animal die in front of your eyes is a sight to behold. Shortly after taking kill I was back, aiming. I had a lovely pretty bird, way up in the tops of the trees in the telescopic sight. My Uncle just checked to see what I was aiming at. He asked me softly and i described the bird – its bright plumage, green and beautiful;. He said, ‘Stop Wez’ – ‘don’t fire!’. I had half slipped the trigger and it was on the point of a shot. i relaxed my finger and asked him “why?”‘ “oh, that’s a native pigeon and they are protected birds under Maori law and it is illegal to kill them. You’ll get into trouble if you shoot that one.” I learnt the difference between a fluffy rabbit and a native pigeon and it was a wonderful day. The farm cats feasted on the rabbit and i got to keep its tail.

Guns are dangerous, people, and the police should not be carrying them, certainly not for medical purposes.

Coffee Cup Syndrome

Here is another letter of complaint about a Dr Darryl Watts incident. this complaint resides with a senior nursing manager (Perry Attwell) at Aneurin Bevan University Health Board. It shows how trivial medical staff can be in the mental health system.

Hi Perry,

Further to our telephone conversation, I am writing you an email, as requested, with Karen Newman cc’ed.

I would like to request that you reinvestigate the incident which I already reported to you regarding the acuphase I endured at the hands of Dr Darryl Watts. I found this particular incident to be one of the worst incidences of malicious medical malpractice I have ever witnessed and believe that it clearly indicates Watts’ un-reformed criminal character.

Whereas I have found it unsettling to discover Watts’ past demons, I do smell blood here and will not let my enemies have a wink of sleep. I will not let this matter rest, purely from a vengeful perspective. Watts went out of his way to take 4 whole days out of my time and life (plus recovery) by delivering an unnecessary acuphase.

He thought it was particularly funny and Gareth Lane and himself had a good giggle at the time. I hope that giggling now haunts him because it has fired me into action. He wants to go out of his way to ruin my life, then I will let as much of the public know about his own failures in life and his own sick ideas on reality.

I was an inpatient under Watts’ treatment at Talygarn. I like drinking green tea and always have my own green teabags. It is an antioxidant and helps combat the torture chemicals you use by force upon me during incarceration. The teacups at Talygarn were small and it was difficult to get a good brew from them. I asked the staff and got the staff’s permission to bring in my own mug so that I could enjoy my green tea more whilst an inpatient.

Nicola, my partner, brought me a mug from home and on entering Talygarn at visiting time she was subjected to a search by nurse in charge, Jayne Hughes (one of Agi Tyson’s good friends and working colleagues). By the time I managed to locate Nicola she was crying her eyes out and Jayne was screaming at her. Jane banned her from visiting me any more and entering Talygarn as Nicola had brought contraband into the ward. The coffee mug was deemed an offensive weapon. I tried explaining that I had staff permission for the coffee mug. Jane threw Nicola out. She then called in Dr Watts and Gareth Lane who decided that it would be a good idea to implement their obvious punishment strategy a further notch (due to Agi Tyson affair).

Watts and Lane, while giggling uncontrollably took me into a room where Lane was physically threatening and Watts thought he’d get in on the act too, while being protected by his insane nurse. They ordered me off to Beechwood for four days for Acuphase as a result of Nicola bringing me a coffee mug.

Acuphase, as I need not explain is a pretty serious affair. This was completely unnecessary. I travelled down to the secure Beechwood Ward and accepted my fate. I didn’t resist as I didn’t blame the Beechwood staff for just following the orders of their employment. The nurse, Paul (with moustache) who administered the injections did tell me (and he wanted it off the record) that he really disagreed with his instructions in this incident as he knew that Watts was out of order and that I didn’t require acuphase.

I tried writing a letter of complaint at the time but it was torn up by Beechwood staff when I gave it to them to deliver to the Hospital managers. I think I may have written another note to the managers but of course the matter went unresolved. I also did inform you verbally in person about the incident at the time but no action was ever taken to investigate or discipline Watts, Lane and Jane.

I would like this matter looked at again as there must be medical notes in existence to verify that I am not a liar.

After the acuphase I returned to Talygarn and eventually returned home, although I think I lost several managers hearings / section appeals (as I usually do).

I actively tried to remove Watts as my psychiatrist from that point as I obviously regarded him as very dangerous. I also tried to avoid Lane. Eventually – a long time afterwards I was transferred out of forensic psychiatry and away from Watts although Lane persisted in harrassing me and treating me for a considerable amount of time afterwards. The fact that you are getting Lane to harrassingly call me and ruin my Christmas and enact police / section kidnaps – on my birthday no less, shows me that the immaturity and criminality of the local mental health system knows no bounds.

I would like this particular incident to be addressed, especially now in the knowledge that Watts was in fact a convicted criminal. I find the matter so deeply disturbing my feelings cannot be expressed in words.

Regards

Wesley Gerrard

As you might be able to tell, I am a little angry about the ridiculousness of this situation. It may be minor to the casual reader, but let me assure you that Acuphase is about the most serious form of mental health drug on the market and it makes you feel so bad that words cannot describe. It’s a serious misuse of medicine and clear negligence. All over the sake of a coffee cup… These doctors are out of their minds and out of control.

Here is the official response, from Aneurin Bevan University Health Board Chief Executive, Judith Paget…

As can be seen by the response to this complaint, the bosses of Darryl Watts have defended his abominal actions to the letter claiming he made good medical decisions. We are talking about a convicted paedophile who has no right to practise medicine, who is treating me, a non-criminal, against his consent, while detaining him, using the mental health act. I find the inability of Watts’ bosses to recognise malpractice as particularly irresponsible and most disturbing. It seems as though I will not be getting justice on this particular occasion and to be honest I feel that any for,m of justice in my plight against mental health is seemingly futile based on the clear cut defensive stance taken by senior NHS policy-makers towards their psychiatrists. Where can one obtain justice as a mental patient?

Aneurin Bevan University Health Board: Complaint about Criminal Psychiatrist, DR DARRYL WATTS

When I found out just prior to Christmas 2014, about my former psychiatrist Dr Darryl Watts’ criminal convictions (see category http://endofterror.org/?cat=191 for more details) , I was upset, to say the least. I decided to follow the appropriate channels and sent a complaint to the Chief Executive of the Aneurin Bevan University Health Board Trust, the local NHS for this area of SE Wales. They are ultimately the employer of Dr Watts and were responsible for him being assigned to my care in the first place. Judith Paget is the current Chief Executive and having attended a private meeting with her in the past to address mental health issues, I do know her personally. I addressed the complaint to Judith, as I discovered (here: http://www.wales.nhs.uk/sitesplus/866/opendoc/169907 ) that she was part of the small committee that actually gave Watts the job in the first place. From the newspaper articles surrounding his conviction I know that he is forced to disclose the full details of his criminal history to any future employer. Therefore the Aneurin Bevan UHB had full knowledge of the character of the man that they were employing.

Here is the relevant text from the above cited NHS WALES document (pp13-14) surrounding the appointment of Dr Watts.

“3.3 Appointment of Consultant Adult Psychiatrist with a

special interest in Forensic Rehabilitation
The Health Board held interviews for the post of Consultant
Adult Psychiatrist with a special interest in Forensic
Rehabilitation on Friday 25th February 2011.
13Aneurin Bevan Health Board
Wednesday 23 March 2011
Agenda Item: 7.2
The appointments panel comprised the following members:
REPRESENTING THE CHAIRMAN:
Miss Sue Kent, Vice Chair, Aneurin Bevan Health Board

REPRESENTING THE CHIEF EXECUTIVE:
Mrs Judith Paget, Director of Planning and Operations, Aneurin
Bevan Health Board
REPRESENTING THE MEDICAL DIRECTOR:
Dr Stephen Hunter, Associate Medical Director, Aneurin Bevan
Health Board
REPRESENTING THE ROYAL COLLEGE OF SURGEONS OF
PSYCHIATRISTS:
Professor Gary Sullivan, Regional Advisor, Bwrdd lechyd Cwm
Taf Health Board
REPRESENTING THE ANEURIN BEVAN HEALTH BOARD:
Dr Steve Attwood, Consultant Psychiatrist, Aneurin Bevan
Health Board
1 applicant was interviewed for the post.
The recruitment and interview process was conducted in
accordance with Health Board policies and procedures.
The appointments panel recommended Dr Darryl BallantyneWatts
for appointment to this post.”

I heard nothing for quite some time from the Trust and then received the below letter that I was told was a final resolution to my complaint about all the misdemeanours I suffered under the ‘care’ of Dr Watts over a two year period.

[Here is the body text of the letter, reproduced…]

“I am writing further to your email to the Putting Things Right Team on 22 December 2014 regarding issues you have raised in relation to the background of a clinician providing care for you within the Aneurin Bevan University Health Board. Firstly, can I please sincerely apologise for any distress you may have experienced in relation to this matter.

On receiving your e-mail, I asked colleagues in the Mental Health and Learning Disabilities Division to contact you before Christmas to discuss this matter with you and I am aware that you have been receiving ongoing support from our team over the last couple of weeks. I hope this support has been helpful.

Specifically in relation to the concerns that you raised, I should like to inform you that when the Doctor in question was appointed to the Aneurin Bevan University Health Board, the appointment panel was aware of the individual’s past history and due process was followed including confirmation that the Legal and GMC restrictions had been served and that there had been no fresh issues since the original offence that would cause concern to prevent the clinician’s right to practice

In conclusion, I would like to thank you for bringing your concerns to our attention. I understand that you have already received a copy of our information leaflet which explains how you may take matters further, through the Public Services Ombudsman for Wales, should you remain dissatisfied with this response.”

My first impression of the letter was disgust. I was annoyed that Paget herself could not regard the matter sufficiently horrific to attend to the complaint. I felt the sarcasm of the fact that they admitted sending out mental health services and subsequently police to harass and detain me, over the festive period where I wanted to enjoy myself at home, while on a study break from my university courses. The last place I wished to be was under treatment from the very organisation about which I was complaining. I do not have faith in the mental health services of Aneurin Bevan UHB and do not feel safe in their environment. AT ALL.

They seemed completely nonchalant about Watts’ appointment and seemed to defend him to the hilt. He had a right to practise his medicine and who are they to deny that? I just wonder how many others have been affected by an irresponsible appointment? Now that the man is allowed back working with children in the area, as a psychiatrist, I find this sickening. When you hear about the convicted Welsh footballer, Ched Evans, facing such public outcry over his return to football it does make you question some of Aneurin Bevan UHB’s decisions here. A convicted doctor has a right to work and ‘sod the public’ – they have no need to know. It’s just ridiculous and smacks of institutionalised paedophilia that you here so much about in the media. I am unsatisfied with the response and have informed the trust of this and have taken the matter to the Public Ombudsman for Wales where I hope they will see some sense in my grievances.
I am annoyed that it seems that my whole meeting with Mrs Paget and some colleagues about a year ago, is now a complete waste of time. In our hour session we discussed from a patient’s perspective how the mental health services could be improved. In particular I talked of how Occupational Therapy could receive more funding and one of Judith’s colleagues suggested how they wanted to employ me in a education role, to help train their staff about how a mental patient actually perceives the services. After the meeting I left feeling like my voice had been heard but there was zero follow up and nothing ever transpired.

Quite frankly, having worked in an educational role: teaching music (DJing) for the government, Arts Council Wales, Newport Arts Council, Monmouthshire Youth Services, DOE Award Scheme, Newport Arts Disability, Nash Pilot Project, NASH homeless hostels, Young Offenders Orgs and various others – I cannot possibly accept a position as a teacher for an establishment that actually employs convicted child sex offenders. It is just ridiculous attempting to educate in a system where the very head is knowingly appointing such vile members of society to work at taxpayer wages of some ridiculous 6 figure per annum sum… How I am expected to maintain any sort of faith in this Health Trust from now on, God only knows, but I do know that they won’t be going away.

Yes, it may be victory for you, Dr Darryl Watts et al, but I’ll be the one sleeping tonight, with a clear conscience. Have a look in the mirror at your own mental health issues, all involved.

All I can say is that Aneurin Bevan, for all the good he brought to Britain, in founding the NHS, must be turning in his grave to see his name attached to such a vile organisation as the Aneurin Bevan University Health Board Trust.

You may have won this round, mental-healthers, but the End Of Terror will fight on…

Police Brutality and Mental Health – PART 2

In this second post about my experiences of police brutality and mental health, I wish to discuss the nature of problems affecting diagnosed mental health victims when it comes to attempting to conventionally use police services.

If you’ve ever been a mental inpatient you are probably aware that the police’s jurisdiction does not extend to mental hospitals. There is no protection for incarcerated patients no matter how many times you contact police. Therefore you are forced to deal with crime inside a hospital environment on your own. This in itself is dangerous, especially when often it is the polices themselves who have removed you to the locked environment. I suppose, it could be argued that it makes sense not to want to seek help from an organisation that works on behalf of the secret prison system that is mental health lockup.

The problem I have found, is that once back in the community, attempting to build up your life, should you ever require the assistance of the police in a conventional way. To report a crime or anything else, you do not get standard service that a public user of their service might expect.

This dilemma is created by, despite diagnosed mental illness not (yet) being a criminal offence, it is recorded by the police and you do show on their system as being diagnosed mentally ill. When you call 999 or 101, caller display and police monitoring systems indicate immediately and you are flagged as a ‘mentally ill’ customer.

I first encountered the reality of this situation over a decade ago when, during a business dispute whereby some of my business’ equipment was illegally seized and I was attempting to recover it I was held hostage on someone else’s business premises with active threats of violence which I feared could result in murder. I felt I had no real alternative but to report the matter to the police, from a question of personal safety as much as anything else. Luckily, I had a mobile phone so I dialled 999 and reported the matter from within my locked environment.

After about 15 minutes the police turned up at the location. they entered the premises where the owner was actually in the room with me. The police entered, and despite me having given a lucid sane account of the crime I alleged, the police did nothing to the person I was reporting, but on entering the building put me up against the wall, inside the place where I’d been captive for about 90 minutes and started conducting a body search. I asked them exactly what they were doing as it was I who had contacted them and was the victim of a crime. The Asian officer, who I knew from the local Caldicot police (part of Gwent police), informed me that because I was mentally ill, this was standard procedure and he had to check me for concealed weapons which I obviously did not have. After conducting a thorough body search I asked him if he would now attend to the criminal matter at hand and that a) I wanted out of my hostage situation and if possible I wanted the recovery of my stolen computers and other business equipment that were being locked in a different part of the building. The police officer told me that I was trespassing and had to leave the premises without my equipment. I was quite shocked, but equally quite glad to be alive and no longer being held in a hostage situation. The police never followed up the matter at all, but I was very ill at ease and realised that I wouldn’t get conventional treatment from the police due to my mental health status. As a business you have to right off the occasional asset and possessions aren’t everything in this world. Health is a priority and preserving life is a necessary factor in living.

I tried my best not to ever contact them again but unfortunately many years later I had the misfortune of having to report a crime and felt that to make a 999 call was the only viable option.

My fiancée, Nicola, had a friend around our house for the evening. They had been enjoying themselves and having a few drinks whilst I was just minding my own business, ploughing away with my computer work…. running so many internet sites and social media takes a lot of dedicated effort! lol…

It came time for Nicola’s friend to go home. It was about midnight and she had booked a taxi. Nicola told me her friend was leaving and asked if I’d do the gentlemanly thing and escort her friend outside and to see her safely into the taxi. Of course, as chivalry demands I obliged and walked the lady outside. As she got into the taxi, a little drunk as she was, I Couldn’t believe my eyes when the taxi driver leant over her, strapped her seatbelt in and not realising that I was present, openly groped the passenger’s breast. I immediately protested and demanded to see the driver’s identity card. He showed me a ‘hackney carriage id’ with his photo on. I felt it strange that a local taxi in South Wales should have a London cabbie’s ID. The taxi sped off down the road before I could discuss matters further and sort the situation myself.

I rushed back inside and quickly explained to the missus what had happened. She was shocked and we both realised that the only people we could realistically call in this potential kidnap situation was the police on 999.

I reluctantly dialled ‘999’ and the operator speedily put me through to the police. As I was reporting the incident, I realised that I was speaking to a local police operator from her accent. the questioning seemed to be directed away from the incident and she seemed to be just gathering information on me. there was an obsession to get my details and not the details of the crime. It was like going through a standard call centre security check, like when you ring the bank. I suddenly realised that I had obviously flagged on their system as mentally ill and they were messing around. This, when Nicola’s friend’s life was in potential danger, made me angry. I hung up on the 999 call and immediately rang 999 again to try and get a better response from a different operator. I got put through to a police operator somewhere in the East Midlands if I remember correctly. I rushed through my incident report which was accepted well and she informed me that the matter was being dealt with and that the incident could expect a response.

After this 999 call ended, I quickly rang Nicola’s friends partner, who was waiting for her at home. I explained to him the situation and he was very worried, but luckily as we were talking, his drunken partner stumbled through the house door. Nicola and I breathed a sigh of relief and were just glad that the worst had not transpired in the incident. As we experienced relief we could hear a massive noise outside as vehicles started storming the neighbourhood. I realise it was the police arriving. Nicola went running outside to explain what had happened and that her friend was home safe.

I had my dressing gown on and was pondering about getting changed before I saw the police but I thought I’d better get outside and check that Nicola was OK.

This is where matters broke down and still to this day I cannot get my head around the actual lunacy that resulted. I have put in IPCC complaints etc about this and tried to pursue the matter but obviously it’s a waste of time dealing with that particular organisation.

I went through the front door and Nicola was about 25 metres away, surrounded by a group of yellow-vested police. She looked frightened and I was worried about what was happening. Stood on my front lawn I politely inquired of Nicola if she was Ok and all was OK. On hearing my voice, a second group of approximately 10-12 officers, saw me and in a military formation started rushing at me, as a group…. I raised my hands just to try and settle them. Perhaps they thought I was the reported criminal, and Nicola was the victim? This was not actually the case as the IPCC would have reported this to me when I entered my official complaint.

The police grabbed me. I offered no resistance at all, as obviously I had just dialled 999. I was thrown face down on the floor and handcuffed. The young PC, about 20 years old, who led the charge and had handcuffed me then proceeded to boot me in the back of the head and left his foot embedded in my neck, applying pressure. I couldn’t breathe at all and felt close to death. I was suffocating as I was face down in the mud with a boot in the back of my head / neck, obstructing my airways. I was in a stress position with my hands secured behind my back in cuffs. I started having an asthma attack after several minutes and somehow the officer’s heavy jackboot was removed from my neck. I was hyperventilating and just pleaded to see a doctor. He shouted at me that he was a doctor. As i re-caught my breath I was removed from the ground and escorted towards one of the waiting police vans. I asked them politely if they could get my inhaler from inside my home as I was having an asthma attack and needed it, especially anticipating I would be locked in the airtight, sealed back of a police van for a journey to wherever.

They refused to get an inhaler and were still surrounding Nicola in a military-style ring formation. I was concerned for my partner’s safety as I didn’t really want to leave her in the company of this particular section of police officers. You have no choice, however, and there was nothing I could do but quietly pray as the vehicle moved off. Cuffed, back of the wagon, not for the first time, hardly able to breathe. It is disturbing travelling in the back of a ‘meat wagon’ yet when you’ve been cuffed in the back of an ambulance the first time they introduced handcuffs to your life, travelling police-style isn’t as scary as people might imagine.

The van stopped and the doors were opened and I was grabbed out, yet the cuffs were not removed. I was at the back of Newport Central police station. I was escorted into the processing area. I thought I’d go straight to the custody desk and be able to get some sense out of the custody sergeant and at least be able to phone and check that Nicola was safe and well as that was my main concern. With a sexual predator being around my home, the last thing I need is to be wondering if the missus is home safe with doors securely locked. At Newport Central, however, nothing is very easy. There were two police in the van. One, the 20 year old male ‘doctor’ who had assaulted me. The other, one from Nicola’s surrounding ring, a woman officer, who I later established was the officer in charge of the whole ‘operation’ and was a beat officer from Chepstow. Never seen either before in my life. They stopped behind the closed door of the custody suite, just inside the entrance, one either side of me restraining my arms, even though I was cuffed behind my back. We stopped and I was held there for I’d estimate about 60-90 minutes. The bloke on my left was obviously bored and decided to relieve his boredom by twisting my thumbs on my left hand around, trying to dislocate them or break them, no doubt. After being the victim of his assault outside my home I was in no mood to verbalise anything with him, for obvious reasons. In a police situation the best thing to do is to remain calm. A police officer full of adrenaline is a dangerous thing. Any form of ‘dissent’ will be punished. His officer to my right was not torturing my thumbs nor was she aware of his little idea of ‘fascist police brutality’.

I got to the custody desk, asked to call my partner at home, was denied and moved straight to the holding cells. No charge, no comment, no offer of communication about what is going on, no offer of legal representation. No communication whatsoever. Luckily, another officer managed to release me from the rather restrictive cuffs at this stage and I was so glad to get into the back of the cell where I could start reworking my circulation. At the end of the day, as a professional DJ who requires his hands for work, there is nothing worse than handcuff wounds and finger / thumb injuries… My thumb has never become right since that day. It’s a real challenge, spinning vinyl, when you’ve been tortured by police officers on so many occasions, directly on the parts of the body you need most to earn a living.

Unfortunately they wouldn’t shut the cell door and give me any peace and kept it open as, after waiting so long to get into the place there was a crazy rush to get me out. I was moved on by a fresh police officer straight out of the nick and into a more comfortable cage in the back of another van. No communications again as to where we were heading, why we were heading there, what was going on, but you expect it off the police. I recognised this copper from a previous detention and he seems a little more settled than the rampaging lot who had kidnapped me earlier in the evening.

Eventually we turned up at the secure mental hospital ward, Beechwood, St. Cadoc’s Hospital. Luckily an Ok nurse, my mate Mick was the nurse in charge for the evening. He could see that the coppers had had a right go at me and luckily as they released me into his custody he let me just have a wander off in ‘freedom, around the St. Cadoc’s grounds and garden outside the ward as he knew full well I wouldn’t be seeing any outside or nature for quite some time.

I was of course to be ‘treated’ by the criminal mental patient forensic police-employed Newport Central psychiatrist Dr Darryl Watts (see – #EoT category http://endofterror.org/?cat=191 ) for the duration of my detainment. Mick gave me one last privilege before I was sectioned as he humanely allowed me to phone Nicola, who thankfully was at home, alone, with doors locked, and safe. I had a cigarette to calm and then faced a junior shrink to get sectioned. god knows what for… to this day and post court hearings (Mental Health Review Tribunal) I do not know how the hell calling 999 to report a directly witnessed sex crime can be mental illness, yet if the police psychiatrist who is treating you is a convicted sex offender then I suppose it makes some sort of sense (as twisted as mental health logic goes).

I think that as much as I hate the police state that I believe one has to accept that it is a reality. With the IPCC (Independent Police Complaints Commission) being so useless, it is important for people to document crimes by the police publicly. At the end of the day, if the outright murders of Brazilian tourist, Jean Charles de Menezes, and newsagent, Ian Tomlinson, go completely unpunished then what hope is there for other police victims in the UK? History teaches us about the rise of Nazi Germany post-1933 and what resulted in that. The scariest thing for me was that one of the first groups of people Hitler exterminated as war broke out, were the mental patients. i think that they paved the way for the gypsies and jews and slavs etc that followed. Obviously modern psychiatry was born directly out of concentration camp science. We live in a repetition of history and early 21st century Britain is in danger of being remembered in the same way as 1930s Germany.

I’ve got plenty more episodes of this blog to release, equally traumatic, if not more so, and while ‘freedom’ allows I shall continue to fight for the truth and justice and the end of tyranny and evil in mental health and psychiatry.
to be continued…

Ps. they didn’t have an asthma pump in the police station or hospital so I had to wait for my partner to arrange visiting times and bring one in for me at which point it was confiscated as it hadn’t been prescribed by the psychiatrist in charge.

[This is part 2: READ PART 1 of this story thread here… http://endofterror.org/?p=512 ]

‘Child porn’ doc: Limits imposed: Dr Darryl Watts

By This is Bristol | Posted: October 28, 2008

A psychiatrist who surfed the web for child pornography has been told he can only treat adults for the next 18 months. Dr Darryl Watts, 45, was suspended from practice for a year in April 2004 after he used the internet for up to 30 hours a week to look at obscene pictures of youngsters.

The General Medical Council (GMC) heard how the doctor from Hereford started his surfing habit after he was signed off work with depression while working at a large practice in Bristol.

Before his conviction, Watts had been based at Blackberry Hill Hospital, Fishponds, looking after adult NHS patients.

Watts, who qualified in Bristol in 1984, moved with his long-term partner to Hereford and joined Hereford primary care trust in January 2003, three months before his arrest.

Police raided his home as part of Operation Ricochet and seized his computer, which contained an image of a naked girl aged between five and seven in a sexual pose.

Watts was fined £1,500 by Hereford magistrates in August 2003 after admitting possession of an indecent photograph of a child under the age of 16. He was also ordered to register as a sex offender for five years and his computer was destroyed.

In October 2006, he was allowed to carry on working, provided he only treated adults.

He was removed from the sex offenders’ register in August this year and has not re-offended for three years.

But GMC panel chairman Ralph Bergmann this week said restrictions were still necessary because Watts still needed to demonstrate a further period of non-offending without the controls of the sex offenders’ register.

He said: “In your evidence you explained you viewed child pornography at a time when you were feeling depressed and were under considerable distress.

“While you stated in evidence that you regret what you have done, this panel is not convinced that you have the necessary level of insight into your offending behaviour and its consequences,” said Mr Bergmann.

“In addition, the panel has borne in mind that you were convicted of a very serious offence.

“This panel takes a serious view of the nature of this conviction and its implications for the maintenance of public trust and confidence in the medical profession.

“The panel notes that your name was only removed from the Sex Offenders’ Register as recently as August 2008.”

Placing restrictions on his registration for a further 18 months, Mr Bergmann told Watts he must follow his psychiatrist’s advice against over-working as he started a part-time consultancy job with Gwent Healthcare NHS trust in Newport in December.

As part of his new restrictions, Watts is only allowed to work with adults. The doctor is also only allowed to carry out four NHS sessions a week.

He must also notify his employers, or any future employers, of the restrictions on his practice.

Watts will have to return to the GMC in 18 months, when a conduct committee will decide whether further restrictions should be imposed.

Police Brutality and Mental Health – PART 1

I have no criminal record. But, I have been in the mental health system of the UK since 1997 – 18 years to date. Unfortunately the name ‘health’ in ‘mental health’ is a misnomer. The mental health system is nothing but a secret prison system where people can be easily silenced and removed from society without appropriate balances and checks such as those that exist in the criminal justice system. The police have a very active role in mental health and very often the first people you see when you are sectioned under the mental health act are the police. They do not have to place you under arrest verbally. If you are diagnosed or under suspicion of having a mental health condition you can just be attacked by them, handcuffed and dragged off in the back of a van to either a police station – deemed as a ‘place of safety’ under the mental health act, or directly to a mental hospital, usually in the custody of police, direct to a secure mental hospital locked ward. There is an illusion in the public that you have to be seen by a judge or get legal assistance but the reality is that once TAKEN you usually have to wait 5 months in custody before going before a court of law. Those five months of non-consensual treatment and torture with no freedom at all are obviously hell.

Over the years the police have become more and more involved in my mental health treatment. I want to use End Of Terror to publicly address some of the worst brutality I have experienced from them. I feel I have a duty to the public to warn them as the police are very dangerous and can cause members of the public serious harm. They have been stepping up their militarisation here in the UK for a number of years now and I believe them to be a hardened criminal incorporation who believe they are exempt from the law.

In this post I will illustrate one example of brutality where I have photographic evidence. I have presented this case to the IPCC (Independent Police Complaints Commission) on a number of occasions. This body, however, is a sham and is not fit for purpose. The police escape punishment and never learn from their crimes.

The above scar comes from a stay in Newport Central Custody Suite – a ‘place of safety’ in the summer of 2011. I had been seized by police from my front garden after a transvestite neighbour who I didn’t get along with falsely reported me as streaking in the neighbourhood. I hadn’t been streaking at all. I was in my dressing gown and was minding my own business. The police turned up, stripped me naked and handcuffed me. I had recently been appointed a police forensic psychiatrist on my previous visit to Newport Central. This psychiatrist, Dr Darryl Watts, is a convicted criminal, convicted in 2003 of serious child sex offences. In 2011 (and still to this day to my knowledge) Watts was working for the police out of Newport Central. It sort of defies logic that the police should employ a convicted sex offender to work out of their station, but that is my opinion. It just proves the criminal mentality of Gwent police and how low they are prepared to stoop.

I was thrown naked into a cell, having been bundled out of the van. At last, I was free from the handcuffs. I didn’t have time to inspect my handcuff wounds, however. As per usual the custody sergeant gave me no access to a phone call either to family or to a solicitor. I was then kicked in the side by a forensic community nurse, Gareth Lane, who was Dr Darryl Watts’ partner in crime or second in command. The police refused to clothe me. I was then left alone in the cell with the convicted paedophile sex offender, Dr Darryl Watts. [See Daily Mail and Bristol Post]He was mouthing off repetitious nonsense, about me being the sickest person he has ever seen, some sort of mantra which I later discovered was part of his own plea to the judge during his trial and conviction years ago. Watts is obviously a mental patient himself and although under the treatment of a psychiatrist for diagnosed mental illness, he is allowed by the police to practise psychiatry.

Watts eventually left thank god, and although naked, I was allowed time to recuperate although without a toilet or any water, despite asking for hours for either a glass of water or to be able to go to the toilet, I was just left alone , naked. I wonder about deaths in custody and just exactly how many police prisoners in custody actually starve to death, die of thirst or suffocate in cells.

Police started gathering outside the cell as I could see them through the little glass window. I counted about 8 or 9 of them in all and could hear them egging each other on to psych themselves up for something.

The cell door open and the light switch was turned off. Officers started piling into the cell and that was the last thing I could remember. I awoke some time later in a secure ward – Beechwood Ward, at St Cadoc’s Hospital. As I awoke, I felt great pain in my side and I looked down on the bed and I had a deep cut running from my belly around my hip to my back.

I struggled up and asked a nurse on Beechwood how on earth I had gotten there and who had assaulted me. He said that the open wound was an old rugby injury but I had retired from rugby 20 years previously and hadn’t touched a ball since.

I had been placed under section and when I finally got a transfer for good behaviour off the secure ward to Talygarn Ward, County hospital, Griffithstown, Pontypool, I managed to smuggle in a mobile phone with a camera to take the photos of the injury that you can see in this post.

A friend who visited me and who was no stranger to police brutality himself, informed me that in his opinion the weapon used was an ‘extendy’ truncheon, a thin metal rodlike truncheon. To this day, however, I do not know what actually happened although I do know that a criminal police doctor was present at Newport Central that day. I do regard the matter as not only a serious physical assault but a sexual one also as I was naked the whole time and when you are naked in the company of sex offenders and rendered unconscious, God forbid what might have happened.

There was a camera in the cell that I was in and I later got a solicitor from the criminal justice system to obtain the footage for me so I could see how the assault was committed. However, the tape conveniently went missing and Gwent Police refused to hand it over.

After a while and having lost all my court hearings due to my psychiatrist – Dr Darryl Watts’ lies and nonsense, I eventually returned home and went back to my civilian life. However, it wasn’t long before the police stepped up their act and went a few stages further in their brutality….

I was lucky on this occasion to have escaped with my life. I am scarred for life physically yet the worst scars are the mental ones. When you are treated by police officers in this way it puts you in a difficult situation mentally whenever you are unfortunate enough to encounter them. When I see them in public, at train stations or driving past in the street, I experience levels of fear and stress and anger that are indescribable. I do not believe that the police are human and think that they are a sub-species.

(to be continued)

[This is part 1: READ PART 2 of this story thread here… http://endofterror.org/?p=650 ]

Psychiatrist who surfed web looking for child porn and violence free to work with children again: Dr Darryl Watts

By Daily Mail Reporter
UPDATED: 12:34, 4 May 2010

A psychiatrist who surfed the web to look at depraved pictures of youngsters is free to work with children again.

Dr Darryl Watts blamed stress and depression after he spent up to 30 hours a week on the internet looking at images of violence and indecent pictures of young girls.

In April 2003 police raided his home and seized Watts’ computer which contained an image of a naked girl aged between five and seven years old in sexual poses.

Watts was fined £1,500 by Hereford Magistrates after admitting possession of an indecent photograph of a child under the age of 16.

He was also ordered to register as a sex offender for five years and his computer was destroyed.

Watts was suspended for a year by the GMC and later banned from working with children.

But the Hereford-based doctor has successfully appealed for the restrictions to be lifted.

He blamed the stress of a 70,000-patient workload at the Blackberry Hill Hospital, Bristol, for his behaviour.

Watts told the hearing: ‘I began to get into a frame of mind where I began to hate my failings and my shortcomings.

‘I began to get very negative thoughts about myself and dislike myself significantly.

‘When I had time off work because I was not coping I became more introverted.

‘At that time I started to use the internet and I used it to look at things that were horrible images.

‘That seemed to validate what I was feeling in here, in myself. I looked at things to do with suicide and I looked at horrible images of people being hurt or maimed, car crashes, bombings. I did see something to do with Lady Diana.

‘These images were in some way an external representation of what I was feeling inside. Along with the looking at some images of child pornography as well.’

When asked if the child images were sexual he said ‘certainly not.’

In January 2003 Watts moved from the Bristol hospital to a Hereford clinic with his partner Jackie Valentine.

He was caught in Operation Ricochet run by Avon and Somerset Constabulary to combat child porn on the internet and one stored image was found on his computer.

Watts added: ‘I’m so, so sorry I have done it. It won’t happen again. What I did supports the procurement of these sorts of pictures.’

The doctor now works part time at a clinic in Newport as well as running a bed and breakfast in Harewood End, Herefordshire, with his partner.

He spends his spare time cleaning toilets and making beds, he said.

The GMC panel agreed Watts, of Handley Cross House, Harewood End, Herefordshire, could now practice again without restriction.

His governing body found the doctor’s fitness to practise was no longer impaired.

GMC chairman Dr Timothy Ross said: ‘The panel accepts that you now have clear insight into the effects of your behaviour on yourself, your patients, the profession and on victims of abuse.

‘The testimonial evidence is that you have retained the confidence of your professional colleagues and that your clinical competence is not in doubt.

‘The panel is confident that a fair-minded member of the public, if in full possession of the facts would not conclude that it is necessary in the public interest to continue to restrict your registration.

‘The medical evidence indicates that there are no concerns regarding your health and also the reports from your workplace supervisors confirm that you continue to work as a competent and caring doctor, working solely in adult psychiatry, who commands the confidence of his professional colleagues.

‘Talking all factors into account, the panel has determined that your fitness to practise is not now impaired.

‘Having reached that conclusion, the panel hereby revokes the current order of conditions with immediate effect.’

End Of Terror – Under Attack: Why the early #EoT movement collapsed

Back in 2011, when the End Of Terror movement was launched, I felt that the project was great. It was just what I personally needed to do in order to address my mental health treatment issues. I felt that #EoT was fulfilling my vision of antipsychiatry on several levels. Building and running the site was therapeutic for me and I also felt that by getting my own voice heard and giving my patient’s perspective of treatment here in South Wales, I would also be helping other mental health victims across the world, in seeking ways to address their own issues with mental health.

Unfortunately, when you take an anti-establishment stance, it is never easy. I am a lone voice, fighting an established massively rich and powerful, money-making system that spans the globe. Drugs companies force through their agenda and governments fully support mental health agendas. That it is individual patients that are suppressed is no surprise. I realise that any voice of dissent has to be crushed by the Mental Health authorities as there is too much for them to potentially lose.

End Of Terror was quickly discovered by my psychiatric team. They decided that by building and running End Of Terror, it was a symptom of my mental illness and I was locked away in the local mental hospitals. Inside these hospitals it is particularly difficult to build and maintain a website when you are banned from using a computer and have no internet access. All the momentum of End Of Terror was lost and I was kept away from the project long enough for my enthusiasm to dissipate. I appreciated that it was a dangerous thing to do: to confront the very system that was oppressing me, and to confront it directly and publicly using the net.

I felt that #EoT had a fun element to it. It incorporated music and entertainment alongside more serious articles on Mental Health and Human Rights. It also covered some of the wackier details of my own treatment and experiences. I believe that psychiatry needs to be opened up and put under the microscope so that it can be exposed for the dark pseudoscience that it is. End Of Terror’s goal: To Fight for Truth and Justice and the end of Evil and Tyranny in Mental Health and Psychiatry – had this aim and I believe, had launched well and was succeeding.

I’ve kind of let the project gather cobwebs and run into the ground since. I’ve maintained a slight twitter presence http://twitter.com/endofterror

And I’ve also fought the hackers etc who have attempted to destroy the movement’s website – it attracts far more attention than any other website I build and maintain.

In December 2014, I discovered, in my counter-intelligence operations, that the forensic psychiatrist responsible for destroying the End Of Terror movement, was in fact a convicted paedophile. Dr Darryl Watts had been exposed in newspapers such as the Daily Mail and Bristol Post . I felt felt truly sickened that I had been forcibly treated by this psychiatrist and also that #EoT had been destroyed by such a heinous criminal.

I recently decided that it was time to resurrect the movement fully. I never got to the point of expressing all that I had intended at the time of the #EoT creation. I feel that now, in 2015, it is time to carefully resurrect End Of Terror.

I’m just rebuilding and redesigning the whole layout so you’ll have to bear with me as the site redefines its content, old and new. I will post on a less regular basis as previously, so that the whole movement is more sustainable. There’s been plenty more suppression from the mental health system since that point – indeed it has intensified fully, so there will be lots of exciting, new, relevant content.

Welcome back! Here’s to the future.

Your God is a False God

Just going back to my regular meeting with the Stasi earlier this week… (Stasi were originally the East German Secret Police) I refer to my crack psychiatric home treatment team endearingly as the Stasi as it sums up neatly what they are really like.

I was discussing with David, the new Irish male CPN (Community Psychiatric Nurse) a load of reasons why they were all evil for not leaving me in peace alone, away from the horrendously haunting psychiatric system. He said that I was babbling speculative philosophy – that it was all mental illness. I then asked him to expand why it was philosophy. I said that I was speaking the truth and reality but it was philosophy to him as he’d been brainwashed and divorced from humanity through his psychiatric education and training. I was asked repeatedly to show more ‘Courtesy’. I said that there were no laws saying I had to be courteous, especially to people I do not choose to be in my life. He said that he would get the psychiatrist to implement that I had to be courteous as part of the legal conditions for my C.T.O. (Community Treatment Order). I said that this wasn’t legal and that the psychiatrist had no legal powers to do such a thing. He then spoke about the fact the psychiatrist (Dr. Ballantyne-Watts [Wales Forensic Psychiatry]) actually did have these powers. He expanded by saying that psychiatrists are very powerful (of that I am positively certain) and that some people believe that they are modern day Gods. I thought it was just a witty retort from him at first and giggled a little but the CPNs face remained stern and unchanged. I realised he was serious. I said that I would never be worshipping a human as a God and certainly not a psychiatrist and certainly not Dr. Ballantyne-Watts. He looked puzzled and didn’t seem to comprehend. I guess when you are so conditionned to working in the system, to blindly follow any order from above, that seeing the boss as a living embodiment of God is not strange. He then implied that psychiatrists had superhuman intelligence and were divine. I didn’t really wish to blaspheme against the poor fella’s beliefs. At the end of the day, I believe in freedom of choice, in particular the right to choose one’s religion (as enshrined in the Universal Declaration on Human Rights). I had to just leave the topic and accept that our views differed.

I have noticed, however, over the years, how positively psychiatrists and the mental health system rejects religion. They sneer at it. When I first entered hospital in 1997 I noticed a lot of patients reading the bible and talking about stories from the Bible. this seemed a little strange to me. It was the modern world and our society is quite secular. I hadn’t been brought up particularly religiously, yet had attended school chapel and assemblies every day and had a faint understanding of the Bible. I believed in God, but not rigorously. I was 19 – often people find religion or ‘God’ later in life than at this freshfaced tender age. It seemed bizarre but what seemed more alarming and strange was the way in which the Mental Health nurses enforcedly rejected religion. Bibles were confiscated from patients. Anyone mentionning a religous topic openly was condemned immediately, either sent off for punishment in the secure ward, medicated more (eg. injection), or just harshly verbally reprimanded and mocked. Perhaps there was something to this religion malarky?

Over the years, as I spent more and more time on lockdown I decided to put the time to as good a use as possible by studying and reading. I wanted a career as a musician but music is so oppressed inside a mental hospital it isn’t funny. Radios are confiscated and banned . When i first entered the Mental Health System, patients used to gather in the smoking room around the radio all day. On a Saturday Night there was quite a party atmosphere. I can remember grooving around to the Radio 1 Essential Selection or Lovegroove Dance Party. If you closed your eyes you could imagine yourself in the Ministry of Sound, or wherever you so desired or should have been spending the weekend.

In about 2000 when I was sectionned for a total of ten and a half months, my first experience of total institutionalisation. I managed to smuggle my old school King James Bible in. I secretly read it at night and went straight through, cover to cover. It was a really good read and I’d recommend for anyone to do the same regardless of your religious beliefs. It was also during this period of incarceration that I began going to church. It wasn’t really to fulfill a higher purpose; I just noticed that, by attending church on Sunday in Caerleon’s local church, it gave a good excuse to actually get out of the nuthouse for a while. You could claim that you wished to exercise your right to worship the state religion, and although it took weeks of playing this card before they finally acquiesced, it came to the point where they knew that they might get into trouble for continuing to prevent you from exercising this right. Initially the excuse for not allowing it was that there was a hospital chapel which arranged a Sunday service but it just so happened that at that time nobody could be bothered to actually allow this service to proceed, so in the end they had to let a few others with the same idea, and me, pop into the town for an hour or two. One thing I’ll say about the Caerleon congregation is that they are all very welcoming and the church at that time was generally well-attended. When I saw Arthur, the vicar, stood in his pulpit, remembering those less fortunate in the community, those stuck inside the Mental Hospital, it genuinely touched my heart. I came to know Arthur personally as he made regular trips into the hospital and for patients with few visitors he was absolutely critical to their wellbeing. An outsider might imagine that you have all the care you need inside a nuthouse, with all the healthcare professional being paid to look after you in there. The reality of that situation is quite different. Arthur would sit and chat to everyone, whether they wished to talk about God or anything else they were bothered about. You get treated like cattle awaiting slaughter inside a nuthouse. Another myth of treatment is that you will spend hours talking over all your mental health issues with the psychiatrist. This is the biggest lie of the lot. You see the shrink once a week, usually a Monday morning – It’s the only time they actually are in the hospital physically. And you see them for ten minutes, no more. Never is anything substantial discussed, bar medication. The treatment system is totally dependent on drugs. The rest of the time the shrinks are analysing drugs company marketing material, to see which company is offering the best incentives. Usually cash incentives. I have picked this knowledge up from reading psychiatry books – and just noticing all the drug company bumph lying around in offices – you can see what’s coming next in your treatment regime when the staff start drinking from fresh drug company branded coffee mugs, as it means the drug rep has been and left a few parting gifts after striking a big deal.. There is such a fierce war between drugs companies for the increasingly lucrative market share that the advertising campaigns are like US Presidential races in terms of budget and ferocity of advertising.

Arthur was about the only person to turn to for salvation and, to be fair, is a good man, as he serves his community in the correct manner. When I was in the Beechwood PICU in St. Cadoc’s secure Unit where you have literally nothing, no possessions – nothing, for about 4 months straight, Arthur noticed I’d disappeared and sought me out, bringing a Bible which was like a Godsend, literally. Of course it soon gets confiscated once he’s out the door, but the thought is well intended. I also had my first and only communion inside the locked ward. The staff even told my visitors who turned up that I wasn’t there – I’d been transferred somewhere else and they didn’t know how to find me. They do get perverse kicks when enhancing your suffering. Arthur still managed to get through those barriers and I will forever be grateful.

As a side note, one day on Augustus Ward, an acute Unit in St. Cadoc’s, this posh-looking, well-spoken holy man came in. I sat and had a good quarter an hour chat. He was the Bishop of the See of Monmouthshire, a certain Rowan Williams, who of course is the current Archbishop of Canterbury. It’s funny watching him in Westminster Abbey on the tele with the Queen when you know you’ve had a tepid St. Cad’s coffee with him – of course nowadays they’d probably class this as a delusion but it is true. Ask Rowan Williams if you bump into him if he’s ever been to St. Cadoc’s with Wez G and he’ll tell you the truth… The Priory may get all the spotlight as the place to be but we’ve had a few stars down our way too…

I sound a bit like a preacher here but although I believe in God, after reading the Bible, I read a load of other major religious texts and philosophy and much more. I don’t believe that any one world religion has their definition of God correct – I think that a fusion of beliefs is possible and that religion has been alarmingly misused over the years. My facebook-declared religious views are ‘Ayahuasca Shaman’ but that’s a story for another day.One thing I can say is that most religions carry the same fundamental message. It’s easy to hear people say ‘religion = load of nonsense – cause of all wars -and totally dismiss it, but we must remember that most of modern society has developed as a result of these belief systems. Our ancestors chose to (and indeed chose not to and were sometimes forced to) live their lives by the laws laid down in these books. Even a sceptic has to recognise that there is a great deal of knowledge of good and evil contained in holy texts or beliefs or traditions. It is part of history and culture. The point I aspire to is that it would not harm these Mental Health workers to actually accept some of the ideas and wisdom of these religions. There is a tendency nowadays to reject the old in favour of the new and we have come to accept that change is always for the better. This isn’t strictly true, as too much change will upset the overall balance of any system. Being radical for the sake of being radical leaves you clutching at straws as if you abolish everything as you have no canvas left on which to paint a new picture. The religious beliefs have been around in most cases for thousands of years. Psychiatry is a much more recent cult or fad, which has never properly defined itself. It is a lost pseudoscience (or other categeory) with really wishy-washy vague ideas and definitions.

When I hear daftness coming from people appointed by the UK government to march into my home, threaten me with the law and try and get me to worship another human being, who quite frankly cannot possibly be God…It irritates me to the core and I cannot understand what accepting to do this will achieve. Perhaps why they say I’m mad. If I do bow down before the Doctor, will they finally leave me alone? It’s gone too far for them to withdraw by now and once I’m bowing, I’ll soon be forced to kneel and pretty soon I’ll be prostrating myself and self-whipping my back to punish myself for not being chaste enough in God’s sight. The guy’s only in his Mid-Fifties and even despite the argument between Creationists and Evolutionists, even they would, I hope, unanimously agree that whoever created the world must have done so more than 60 years ago. If there’s evidence to suggest otherwise then I stand corrected.

As I counter-psychoanalyse my interrogators, I observe that they are always so cagey at giving information up, it is hard to pinpoint their actual goals and agenda. God-king cults have sprung up in history – Are the psychiatrists a priesthood? It worries me as people will think that this is all bonkers, I’m lying, nuts whatever, but if you are all worshipping psychiatrists in a decade or so you can look back and say you heard it here first. Silly things do emerge in society from time to time and unless you see them coming it is often difficult ever understanding how they arrived. Take X-Factor or Pop Idol for example? How on earth did they crop up? I, for one, didn’t foresee the music industry being so affected by these TV talent shows. I will always totally reject the worship of psychiatrists, until the torture gets too intense perhaps, but even then I think that I shall resist. Perhaps when my brain finally is in the pickle jar on their desk I might be tempted to pay homage, but even then I’ll still be pulling faces. Psychiatry as a religion disgusts me. Yes – you may think – oh – this cannot possibly be true or ever eventualise but I don’t think that the public in general understand just exactly how powerful the Mental Health movement is. It has all the traits of religion – vast amounts of money, people in powerful positions across society all profit from it, they have the unquestionable loyalty of the weaponised authorities (ie. Police) who are prepared to use force to protect the regime, they have the desire for more control over those they see as weaker and will cease at no issue of morality in order to achieve their ends. When you couple in the sheepish nature of the masses to follow whither they are ordered without questionning the command, the scene is set. I don’t know just how far the Mental Health Act powers will take what is being done in the name of the law. I don’t wish to discover either. Like a cornered animal you have to stand and fight and it would be nice to maintain civilized protocol that dates back before the time of Marx and has been the preserve of peaceful people across eternity. Examine history – look at how such horrific movements spring up from time to time. Psychiatry is weaving its clutches virtually everywhere in a world that has been globalised more than ever before. The entire future of our species is at stake.

Psychiatrists. mental health workers, police, social workers, all involved, your God is a false God. I will not worship my psychiatrist.

[MORE on Dr Darryl Watts aka Dr Ballantyne-Watts – the psychiatrist I am supposed to be worshipping religiously!!! after I discovered his criminal history as a child sex offender in Dec 2014 … http://endofterror.org/?cat=191 ]

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